Author: Andrew Handyside

Tuesday’s Rugby News talk Pulitzer Prizes, Eurovision, “Workshops” and rap feuds. [one_half last=”no”] The Old Man and the Teen (oh, and Valentini) No, this isn’t some awful spoof of Hemmingway’s famous 1951 work you might stumble across on SBS late at night after switching the channel in disgust as your favourite rugby team fails to execute the basics of the game for the umpteenth time. What it is, in fact, is the latest additions to the Wallabies’ squad who are on their way to Europe for the spring tour. In this re-write of the story it’s Adam Ashley-Cooper playing the role…

Tuesday’s Rugby News looks at where the ‘Tahs will be next year, how the 7s finished up, a true Aussie battler and a potential milestone this weekend. [one_half last=”no”] ‘Tahs to be Kings of the ‘Castle Given the NSW state government’s insistence that the best use of tax-payer money, in spite of dismal attendances, is to rebuild the football stadium in Sydney meaning the Waratahs are in search of some other rectangular public spaces where they can run around next year. It had already been revealed that they will play the Shorks, Jags and Brumbies next year at Western Sydney…

Tuesday’s Rugby News criss-crosses the Pacific. New Zealand, Australia, South America, Fiji, Tonga and Samoa all get a guernsey. [one_half last=”no”] All Blacks Name their Squad Much like their defensive line getting away just a little early so to have the All Blacks already announced their squad for the October and November internationals. For the final Bledisloe test in Yokohama on 27 October they’ve announced a 32-man squad to which they’ll add another 19 players for the remainder of their end of year tests. The initial squad, Tight Forwards Dane Coles Nathan Harris Codie Taylor Owen Franks Nepo Laulala Joe…

The NRC headed to Tamworth for the final round clash of two “country” teams in the competition. The yokels from Queensland had plenty to play for, a victory would sew up a home final whereas the bumpkins from NSW were looking to finish a tough year on a high and farewell some of their stalwarts in style An all-country affair IN the capital of country music?  Time to polish the RM Williams, dust off the Akubra and fire up the Landcruiser because it’s about to get more bruising than your average mechanic bull ride at Johnny Ringo’s. First Half It…

Tuesday’s Rugby News will require in-depth knowledge of human anatomy as we cover heads, shoulders, necks and, hang on. That’s not right. [one_half last=”no”] Sam Cane’s Neck All Black openside Same Cane has suffered a year-ending neck injury. Now, it would be easy to throw the cat amongst the pigeons and find highlights of All Black players putting the necks of their opponents into dangerous positions, or we could highlight Steve Hansen’s take on Pocock getting neck rolled “…no wonder he’s got a sore neck. He’s got his head over the ball 90 per cent of the time….” or his…

The Vikings of yore never made it as far as the pacific, so the historical backdrop to this match loses some of its veneer. However, the modern Vikings have the advantage of plane travel and the Fijian locals were more than welcoming of the “invaders” given they were just in town for the latest round of the NRC. With 4 wins apiece and only 2 rounds remaining, things are getting serious.  Both teams are looking good to make the finals just in what order remains unclear so there was plenty to play for. This season’s stats make for some interesting…

Tuesday’s Rugby News is all about odd, off-beat and outlandish statements as well as a quick lap around the grounds to see how the kids are going. [one_half last=”no”] Genia Guarantees It There are times throughout history where people make bold statements and if they’re right they seem to be lost to the annals of time, if they are proven wrong on the other hand it forever is noted against their name and becomes a trivia question. Let me give you some examples, “I think there is a world market for maybe five computers”-Thomas J. Watson, IBM “They couldn’t hit…

Tuesday’s Rugby News covers Hooper in, Thomson out, Thomson in, the newly named rugby “luenaigoune” and the emerging state champs finish up. [one_half last=”no”] Hooper Back in the Game There’s a song by a band called Airbourne called “Back in the Game”, it’s the sort of neck-acne rock that you’d expect American soldiers to listen to before they bring freedom and democracy to whomever they deem in need of it. It’s bold, aggressive, unrelenting and raw, everything the Wallaby backrow wasn’t last time out against Argentina.  As best as David Pocock tried to inspire the piggies they just weren’t the…

Monday’s rugby news is across ALL the local weekend results, covering uni 7s, emerging states and of course, the NRC.  The Argies have also dropped their squad and it’s missing one of their stars. [one_half last=”no”] NRC Wrap I can’t adequately translate the sound of a DJ doing some “phat” scratching on records into written words, so you’ll have to imagine the sound effects for yourself. Anyway, the awkward opening sentence is to lead into a quick NRC round 4 wRAP up (get it? I’m extremely sorry….) Getting things underway in Adelaide we had two teams who it’s fair to…

Tuesday’s rugby news follows up on the recent spat over the weekend, O’Connor finding himself, Sevens stars re-signing and the Poms going pro. [one_half last=”no”] Case Closed Australian rugby has sunk to a new behavioural low this week on the back of the scenes that unfolded at CBUS stadium after the Wallabies’ loss to the Pumas. For a game that has long drawn pride from being “a hooligans’ game played by gentlemen”, what took place between Aussie backrower Lukhan Tui and a spectator almost belies belief.  The sledging, the alleged knocking over of an innocent bystander and both parties needing…

Monday’s Rugby News delves into some more about the Tui incident, the Quade Cooper show, a quick wrap-up of the weekend’s results. [one_half last=”no”] Cooper Sage Continues You’d be pressed to fine a more polarising player in Australia than Quade Cooper. For better or worse, he seems to attract attention wherever he goes. The media scrum that surrounds him might be on the move to Melbourne as the out of favour Queenslander looks to remove any spectre of “what if” when he finally hangs up his boots. (or gives them away, I can’t find it now, but wasn’t he…

Tuesday’s Rugby News has an update on Stannard’s court case, under 20 results, Wallaroo test aspirations and a potential coaching change for rugby powerhouse. Tuesday’s Rugby News [one_half last=”no”] Stannard Court Case James Stannard, a former representative of Australia in rugby sevens has today found himself involved in another of Australia’s favourite pastimes, namely, victim-blaming. The victim of a vicious assault in March of this year, Stannard had to retire before the Commonwealth Games on the Goldy as a result of his injuries sustained, including a fractured skull, in the Coogee Bay attack that left the Rio Olympian…

Tuesday’s Rugby News has the Lions and Crusaders worrying, Souths hoping, the Bledisloe travelling and Dane Haylett-Petty hyphenating. [one_half last=”no”] Super Final Nerves Both teams are getting a bit nervous heading into this weekend’s final to be hosted by the Crusaders. While the Lions are fretting about making a strong start, the crew from Canterbury are worried about the Lions’ maul being unleashed. Coming from behind in their semi, the Lions scored a couple of tries off their maul, something Matt Todd doesn’t want to see repeated this weekend. Speaking in the build up to the season decider he said,…

Tuesday Rugby News is about Rebels, Sevens, line outs and some nasty injuries. [one_half last=”no”] More Rebels in Trouble For a club that this was in the firing line when the Aussie super rugby conference was pared down to four, one might have thought the Rebels would have been on their best behaviour on and off the field this year. And for the on-field part, that mostly was true.  In a dramatic turnaround from last year, the club racked up a franchise-equalling best 7 wins this year and still had a chance of making the finals with half of the final…

Wednesday’s belated rugby news covers the Rebels handing out some fines, Folau’s possible switch to the Reds, the officials for the weekend and Beale’s message for his teammates. [one_half last=”no”] Rebels Pair Cop Fine Not content with missing out on a maiden trip to the Super Rugby finals being the prominent bad news story from the Rebels’ trip to New Zealand on the weekend, Lopeti Timani and Amanaki Mafi decided to make it even worse for the club by getting into an “altercation”. The dust up saw Mafi land in court and Timani, while not requiring hospitalisation, looking worse for…

Tuesday’s Rugby News reviews the review of the TMO reviews, checks out the latest from the judiciary, McKeller’s take on the Brumbies’ season and the first in and outs of the coming finals matches. Also, who are the Stockmen that grace today’s lead photo? Read on and all will be revealed. [one_half last=”no”] TMO Referred to the….. It seems that the almost universal cries of disbelief emanating from pubs, lounge rooms, club houses and stadiums around the southern hemisphere have actually been heard by SANZAAR and World Rugby. It comes off the back of a home and away season in…

Wednesday’s rugby news covers Gatland’s departure from the top job with the Welsh, the Rebels sweating on a couple of fitness tests, some more media coverage for premier grade in Queensland and the Waratahs looking to tick on last thing off their to-do list. [one_half last=”no”] Wales’ New Coach To go with their shitty weather and occasionally wearing all black kit, Wales have taken another step towards trying to morph themselves into the world’s premier rugby team by naming yet another Kiwi at the helm. Current head coach Warren Gatland will continue to lead the team up to and…

Tuesday’s Rugby News has a confusing gander at how the World Cup and Super Rugby Finals qualifications are going, a squiz at the latest out of America and a bit of a Smith injury update. [one_half last=”no”] Seattle Crowned “World Champions” While not yet producing or attracting the big names, big salaries, big egos and big crowds of some of the other northern hemisphere competitions, the current professional rugby competition in the USandA has at least crowned its inaugural champion over the weekend. The Seattle Seawolves will go down in rugby history (and forever be a go-to quiz question) as the…

Tuesday’s Rugby news sees Kerevi down and Folau up.  The ins and outs of the latest round of World Cup Qualifiers and The Brumbies blowing up over their treatment. [one_half last=”no”] Kerevi Injured The Reds’ season has gone from bad to worse. And now from worse, to “no, even worse than that” with the news that bullocking outside centre Samu Kerevi is out for the rest of the season. The Reds not only lose their danger man in the mid-field but one of their leaders around the park with Kerevi shouldering the vice-captaincy this year. Despite playing through end of…

Tuesday’s Rugby News covers the Hooper’s injury and what it means, Folau in hot water, a squiz at the latest rankings and Pocock generally being a legend. [one_half last=”no”] Hooper Injury The fall-out from Saturday night’s test against Ireland continues with Australian and Waratah captain, Michael Hooper, ruled out for up to four weeks with a hamstring injury. Hooper suffered the injury 16 minutes into the final test and he was forced to leave the field immediately.  Replays show him getting what could best be described as folded in half while competing for the ball at the breakdown and…