Inside the Green and Gold Rugby Network
- Thread starter Dismal Pillock
- Start date
Dismal Pillock
Simon Poidevin (60)
Spotlight On: Pfitzy:
"I....... say..... the...... words...... out...... loud..... to.... myself..... as.... I..... type..... them."
Dismal Pillock
Simon Poidevin (60)
http://www.betootaadvocate.com/unca...pocock-and-timomatic-added-to-2016-rich-list/
Calling these two out on
They've got names, they've got faces:
Clancy Overell and Errol Parker.
Check the time stamps baby
**GUILTY** in a court of lore.
WEB LORE
Teh Other Dave
Alan Cameron (40)
Next they'll have Pocock chaining hisself to an Eden Park goalpost.
Dismal Pillock
Simon Poidevin (60)
Welcome to
Gunston World Vision
My name is Gene Gunston of
Gunston World Vision
Now then down to business:
Do you feel desperately sorry for all the poor little dying black bastards in Africa?
Of course you fuckin' do! Have a fuckin' heart!
Cold hearted wanker!
Anyway, here's how you can help:
Just send $1,500 a day to Gunston World Vision to help these
poor little black jokers get the help they so desperately need.
With just $1,500 a day from half the worlds population we can
upgrade to orange buckets for almost HALF of these women:
$1,500 a day is all we need to buy new "erasable chalk"
(Gunston pat pending on all that new fuckin 'chalk business mate)
Anyway, we here at Gunston World Vision firmly believe that
oh shit. Looks like a japanese porno film crew have turned up. I think I've seen that bird pictured above in at least half a dozen of my octopus "dramas"
This must be the porno vid director. Sorry Mr Fats McOctopii, no whale sushi harpooning / octopii grot filming done here in the middle of Africa. Piss off.
Registered SPONSOR
This is where the visiting japanese congregate all fucking day when they're not outside for 2 minutes of the bloody day for their precious facebook photo ops with the poor little dying black buggers.
Just $1,500 a day and we can get Trevor to poison their whole fucking sushi supply.
Problem solved.
These little fellas say "thanks for the erasable chalk!"
Registered SPONSOR
"Look honey, we've all seen the vids, no need to
pretend you don't know what's coming next......"
Righto then, that's all from us here at Gunston World Vision.
Give generously, you black joker hating freaks.
Your pal,
-Gene-o.
Teh Other Dave
Alan Cameron (40)
Gunston Concreting look highly reputable. On a completely unrelated topic, what's your address there, señor Pillock?
Dismal Pillock
Simon Poidevin (60)
no more pipe bombs please. The first 6 or 7 times, yes, very funny, hahaha, we can all have share a laugh afterwards over a pint and a half-exploded bloodied face but enough is enough
(pm me with a SPECTACULAR reason* for wanting address)
(pm me with a SPECTACULAR reason* for wanting address)
(*pipe bombs no longer spectacular reason.)
Google AD
Welcome to.....
GUNSTON CONCRETE.
Straight down to business: WE WILL USE INDUSTRIAL-STRENGTH KILOTONNES OF HEAVY-AS-CONCRETE CONCRETE TO DESTROY ALL OF YOUR GREENERY.
No job too big for Gunston Concrete.
WE WILL ENTOMB FUCKING EVERYTHING.
FUCKING EVERYTHING.
GUNSTON GAURANTEE.
NO PRICK GETS OUT ALIVE.
Our motto is
"NO TREE LEFT BEHIND".
That's the Gunston motto.
We start pouring the concrete AND WE DO NOT STOP UNTIL EVERY FUCKING THIGN IS ANNIHILATED.
NO SIGN OF PLANT LIFE WITHIN A GUNSTON MILE RADIUS.
Here is our next projected project
after Gunston Concrete pay a visit:
Oops, wrong projection.
More like this:
NOTHING WILL EVER GROW THERE EVER AGAIN.
GUNSTON GUARANTEE.
Righto, give us a call and we'll wheel the aircraft-carrier sized concrete mixer around to your place and start pouring right then and there whether you like it or fucking not.
Teh Other Dave
Alan Cameron (40)
Oh no, nothing like that Herr Pillock. You just seem a bit stressed. Like the housework and gardening is getting you down. Perhaps you could leave those troubles behind and crack a cold one on a new patio.
boyo
Mark Ella (57)
Dismal Pillock
Simon Poidevin (60)
Rugby 101
with Coach Graham.
Hi.
Richard Graham here.
Rugby football coach for the Queensland Reds of Australia. Today, I will walk you through some basic rugby football strategies that we employ here at the Queensland Redsrugby team
Stay Out of The Red Zone.
"The Red Zone" is my name for on-field advertising. In this case, "Asteron Life Insurance." I believe these sponsors messages need to be clearly readable AT ALL TIMES during the rugby football match. In fact - small trade secret here - this is usually my main topic of discussion at halftimes. "Stay out of the red zone!"
The straight orange line is an axiomatical adjunct of flange-propelled gradients indicating where the Reds players should move to in order to NOT be standing on the Asteron Life Insurance sign.
As you can see by the scoreboard in the top left corner of the screenshot, my team, (The Reds), are losing by 20 points to nil after 31 minutes. This is due to incorrect implementation of axiomatical red zone gradientation.
Keep Staying Out of The Red Zone
More straight orange line, more tangential axiomatical adjunct bearings. Fairly straight-forward stuff. Although that Reds forward behind the ruck did get a bit of a scolding at halftime for ALMOST standing on the "A" in "Asteron" The halfback clearly stood on the "N" in "Asteron" but I could still read the word ok so I just gave him 10 laps to do at halftime.
Forever Out of The Red Zone
Players #1 and 2 are called a "Red Zone Pod" They are doing a VERY good job of keeping EVERYONE out of the Red Zone, both Reds players and NSW players. Due to their diligence at policing the Red Zone I would not be surprised AT ALL if they were offered free Life Insurance for life by Asteron Life Insurance directly after the game. Maybe even in the tunnel as they headed back to the changing rooms.
I have scribbled over The Red Zone with orange pen in order to further clarify where the Red Zone is.
In order for everyone to stay out of it.
Forever.
Let's hope the Reds NEVER end up in the Red Zone!
--Richard.
with Coach Graham.
Hi.
Richard Graham here.
Rugby football coach for the Queensland Reds of Australia. Today, I will walk you through some basic rugby football strategies that we employ here at the Queensland Redsrugby team
Stay Out of The Red Zone.
"The Red Zone" is my name for on-field advertising. In this case, "Asteron Life Insurance." I believe these sponsors messages need to be clearly readable AT ALL TIMES during the rugby football match. In fact - small trade secret here - this is usually my main topic of discussion at halftimes. "Stay out of the red zone!"
The straight orange line is an axiomatical adjunct of flange-propelled gradients indicating where the Reds players should move to in order to NOT be standing on the Asteron Life Insurance sign.
As you can see by the scoreboard in the top left corner of the screenshot, my team, (The Reds), are losing by 20 points to nil after 31 minutes. This is due to incorrect implementation of axiomatical red zone gradientation.
Keep Staying Out of The Red Zone
More straight orange line, more tangential axiomatical adjunct bearings. Fairly straight-forward stuff. Although that Reds forward behind the ruck did get a bit of a scolding at halftime for ALMOST standing on the "A" in "Asteron" The halfback clearly stood on the "N" in "Asteron" but I could still read the word ok so I just gave him 10 laps to do at halftime.
Forever Out of The Red Zone
Players #1 and 2 are called a "Red Zone Pod" They are doing a VERY good job of keeping EVERYONE out of the Red Zone, both Reds players and NSW players. Due to their diligence at policing the Red Zone I would not be surprised AT ALL if they were offered free Life Insurance for life by Asteron Life Insurance directly after the game. Maybe even in the tunnel as they headed back to the changing rooms.
I have scribbled over The Red Zone with orange pen in order to further clarify where the Red Zone is.
In order for everyone to stay out of it.
Forever.
Let's hope the Reds NEVER end up in the Red Zone!
--Richard.
Dismal Pillock
Simon Poidevin (60)
after 17 years on this website, I just had my first look at the "member user ranks" thing under everyone's name.
Turns out they are Aussie rugby captains from thru the years.
but
10,000 posts = John Eales
25,000 posts = .....James Horwill?
Clearly needs a revamp.
0-5 posts: wife explains offside rule to him.
20th post: thinks "Western Force" are actual rugby team.
40th post: ignore this member: one of Pfitzy's gimmick accounts.
80th post: possibly Welsh.
150th post: smells like dead people.
250th post: escaped Wollongong.
400th post: knows more about macrame than he does about rugby.
600th post: boils parsley
800th post: applies for NZ passport on daily basis
1000th post: once called Moderator a "wanker" in 2007 Rd 3 Natal Sharks vs Orange Free State match day thread
1200th post: yet to shake the "possibly Welsh" tag
1400th post: has funny accent
1600th post: could still turn out for Auckland Blues
1800th post: knows where you live. **AVOID**
2000th post: once threw an old lady down a well.
2200th post: wears kaftan, drives foreign car.
2400th post: cannot pass left-to-right but can make pavlova.
2700th post: has accidentally had own web cam turned on for 3 years now
Turns out they are Aussie rugby captains from thru the years.
but
10,000 posts = John Eales
25,000 posts = .....James Horwill?
Clearly needs a revamp.
0-5 posts: wife explains offside rule to him.
20th post: thinks "Western Force" are actual rugby team.
40th post: ignore this member: one of Pfitzy's gimmick accounts.
80th post: possibly Welsh.
150th post: smells like dead people.
250th post: escaped Wollongong.
400th post: knows more about macrame than he does about rugby.
600th post: boils parsley
800th post: applies for NZ passport on daily basis
1000th post: once called Moderator a "wanker" in 2007 Rd 3 Natal Sharks vs Orange Free State match day thread
1200th post: yet to shake the "possibly Welsh" tag
1400th post: has funny accent
1600th post: could still turn out for Auckland Blues
1800th post: knows where you live. **AVOID**
2000th post: once threw an old lady down a well.
2200th post: wears kaftan, drives foreign car.
2400th post: cannot pass left-to-right but can make pavlova.
2700th post: has accidentally had own web cam turned on for 3 years now
Teh Other Dave
Alan Cameron (40)
Nugget of gold right there. Should check if that match really happened in r3, 2007. Or not.
Dismal Pillock
Simon Poidevin (60)
2800th post: used to forge note from mother excusing him from bullrush
2900th post: best 40-yard time: 8 years.
3000th post: own nana made him cry last week with "brutal hit" in backyard bullrush.
3100th post: sends vicious PM's to Western Force fans on daily basis
3200th post: knows 37 different hues of "vermilion"
3300th post: wife left 1,000 posts ago
3400th post: thinks "Gunstons" are real family
3500th post: still very confused by "debating" threads
3600th post: secretly considers self "excellent debater" but is actually completely shit.
3700th post: withhold's child support to secretly fund ever-expanding Mccaw memorabilia collection
3800th post: thinks "sausage roll" would be quite a racey lineout call.
3900th post: now lives in that car perennially parked right outside Gagger's house.
2900th post: best 40-yard time: 8 years.
3000th post: own nana made him cry last week with "brutal hit" in backyard bullrush.
3100th post: sends vicious PM's to Western Force fans on daily basis
3200th post: knows 37 different hues of "vermilion"
3300th post: wife left 1,000 posts ago
3400th post: thinks "Gunstons" are real family
3500th post: still very confused by "debating" threads
3600th post: secretly considers self "excellent debater" but is actually completely shit.
3700th post: withhold's child support to secretly fund ever-expanding Mccaw memorabilia collection
3800th post: thinks "sausage roll" would be quite a racey lineout call.
3900th post: now lives in that car perennially parked right outside Gagger's house.
Dismal Pillock
Simon Poidevin (60)
4000th post: thinks "anthropology" is the study of ants.
4100th post: sends occasional PM's to debating thread denizens challenging them to offline fights
4200th post: own stupid superstition dictates must shed all garments before posting in threads that begin with vowels.
4300th post: secretly recharges own solar-powered car at Pfitzy's most week nights. Shhhh.
4400th post: tried to copy Pfitzy's solar-power thing and immediately burned down his own house.
4100th post: sends occasional PM's to debating thread denizens challenging them to offline fights
4200th post: own stupid superstition dictates must shed all garments before posting in threads that begin with vowels.
4300th post: secretly recharges own solar-powered car at Pfitzy's most week nights. Shhhh.
4400th post: tried to copy Pfitzy's solar-power thing and immediately burned down his own house.
Dismal Pillock
Simon Poidevin (60)
http://www.wikihow.com
How To Build A Porn Loft. At Night.
Hello.
Have you ever wanted to build a Porn Loft at night?
Here's how:
Step 1. Attend a helpful seminar that will enable you to get in touch with your inner c**t at night:
"So, according to this, I am now a c**t at night?"
"That is correct."
Step 2. WAIT until your wife is at work. At her night job:
Step 3. Stop stuffing around with records and internet porn for long enough to draw up the Porn Loft plan, you pedo nutjob.
You. At night.
Step 4. Sign off with Momoka for the night.
"Goodnight Momoka."
Step 5. Get to work.
Step 6. Upon completing the Porn Loft plan, be sure to draw up an auxiliary plan centred on rewarding yourself with a tasty night-time snack.
Step 7. Enter Porn Loft.
Dismal Pillock
Simon Poidevin (60)
Interesting you mention that, I kind of dont want to mention the source of some of those pics for fear of getting this site some unwanted "attention". Would elaborate via PM though.
Bloody shocker though.
Well, on the bright side, at least it's out of my head.
Bloody shocker though.
Well, on the bright side, at least it's out of my head.
Dismal Pillock
Simon Poidevin (60)
Wayne Gunston's Guide to Gender Roles.
Gidday, poofs. Wayne Gunston here.
"Fucken beaut."
It has come to my attention that some of you softcocks are a bit confused over your poof tackle gender definition roles.
Well, I am here to help you clean up your cock and/or gash-based confusion with some helpful gender definitions.
First though, some bad news for my brother Gene; the term "poof" is no longer a socially acceptable gender definition. Therefore, if you see my brother Gene-o down the pub you just have to call him a wanker instead. This is what he looks like, don't worry, he's so fucken ugly you can't miss him.
"Get fucked Wayne you f
Pipe down, time for the definitions.
Agender: failed at both genders so packing a sook and sitting on the fence.
Androgyne: obviously, a chick gynecologist with a short haircut. You already knew that one.
Androgynous: blokey chick, chicky bloke, too easy.
Bigender: chick with a big arse.
Cis: misprint.
Cisgender: Mexican tranny.
Cis Female: is it just me or are ALL the chicks on that CSI tv show spunks?
Cis Male: I don't notice the blokes on CSI so much.
Cis Man: oh shit, think I may have completely stuffed this whole fucken thing up already.
Cis Woman: she was probably the killer. Sometimes the butler, sometimes the woman. Reckon I?ve seen this episode. Change channels, Trev.
Cisgender Female: Mexican chick who keeps telling everyone that she is a chick.
Cisgender Male: Mexican bloke who is fairly certain that he is a bloke.
Cisgender Man: say it with a comma between the two words at parties.
Cisgender Woman: a woman sympathetic to the plight of the Mexican people. She also has a dick.
Female to Male: basic Cock Attachment 101. You knew this one.
FTM: fat tranny mum.
Gender Fluid: see "agender" but packing an even bigger sook
Gender Nonconforming: spewing about own dick forward slash gash.
Gender Questioning: last bloke picked at lunchtime footy.
Gender Variant: depends how warm it is outside (stockings day or not).
Genderqueer: would have to be my Aunty Doris. She's my queen.
"Just bring the sherry flaggon over you fu
Intersex: 120 kg webcam tranny. Good work if you can get it.
Male to Female: basic Cock Annihilation 101. Pass the sherry, I'll do it myself.
MTF: "Mother fuckin Teresa, what is that?"
Neither: Neither? Neither what? Neither of the two sexes? There's 58 now. Try to keep up.
Neutrois: neurotic French chick.
Non-binary: chick who used to work in a library.
Other: Really? "Other?" You can?t pick ONE of the fuckin 58? PISS OFF.
Pangender: fuck knows. Probably Gene-o.
"Wayne you fuckin smelly cu
Trans: not Neil Young's best lp but still pretty fuckin handy.
Trans*: asterisk denotes bonus track.
Trans Female: bloke who wants to be a chick so he hacked his own dick off.
Trans* Female: asterisk denotes hacking still in progress. Almost there. Blood everywhere but you can't fuckin stop now.
Trans Male: obviously, a bloke who bought the Trans LP.
Trans* Male: bloke who bought the Trans LP but didn't know there would be a bonus track.
Trans Man: bloke who swears black and blue that Neil Young's Trans lp is better than the "Reactor" lp from 1981.
Trans* Man: bloke who didn't like the bonus track on Trans that much.
Trans Person: just a person who enjoys the Trans lp. Doesn't have to be a bloke or a chick, nothing to get so hung up about for fucks sake
Trans* Person: person who has been meaning to buy the Trans LP but just hasn't got around to it yet. (It came out in 1982.)
Trans Woman: chick who likes the Trans LP. Jesus, this stuff is just self-explanatory.
Trans* Woman: "Rust Never Sleeps". another good record.
Transfeminine: tranny who wears undies.
Transgender: trying on women's togs but still has a great big huge fuckin cock. And a beard.
Transgender Female: all the above but now walks down to the shops in a wedding dress.
Transgender Male: bloke who puts on a silly voice.
Transgender Man: bloke who puts on a silly voice but still reckons Neil Young is OK.
Transgender Person: fuck knows, my head's spinning at this stage.
Transgender Woman: chick who wants to get into the movies cheaper.
Transmasculine: Probably my brother Trevor. He thinks he's pretty masculine when he's transporting himself around town in his stupid fucken ute.
"Fucken Wayne you fat cu
Transsexual: the original. www.grannytranny.org. Bookmark!
Transsexual Female: a spunk in Thailand. Everywhere else, bloke in a wedding dress.
Transsexual Male: Simple. Bloke in a dress.
Transsexual Man: what? fuck, thought I had the hang of this?
Transsexual Person: tackle lopped off on the cheap but the surgeon fucked it up and now no one knows if bloke or Sheila.
Transsexual Woman: bit of a spunk. Unless Doc Botha did the oppo. (http://ostsplasticsurgery.wix.com/seacruise)
Two-Spirit: ghost with two cocks.
Well, that covers it. Glad to help clear up your raging poof identity crisis.
--Wayne Gunston.
Gidday, poofs. Wayne Gunston here.
"Fucken beaut."
It has come to my attention that some of you softcocks are a bit confused over your poof tackle gender definition roles.
Well, I am here to help you clean up your cock and/or gash-based confusion with some helpful gender definitions.
First though, some bad news for my brother Gene; the term "poof" is no longer a socially acceptable gender definition. Therefore, if you see my brother Gene-o down the pub you just have to call him a wanker instead. This is what he looks like, don't worry, he's so fucken ugly you can't miss him.
"Get fucked Wayne you f
Pipe down, time for the definitions.
Agender: failed at both genders so packing a sook and sitting on the fence.
Androgyne: obviously, a chick gynecologist with a short haircut. You already knew that one.
Androgynous: blokey chick, chicky bloke, too easy.
Bigender: chick with a big arse.
Cis: misprint.
Cisgender: Mexican tranny.
Cis Female: is it just me or are ALL the chicks on that CSI tv show spunks?
Cis Male: I don't notice the blokes on CSI so much.
Cis Man: oh shit, think I may have completely stuffed this whole fucken thing up already.
Cis Woman: she was probably the killer. Sometimes the butler, sometimes the woman. Reckon I?ve seen this episode. Change channels, Trev.
Cisgender Female: Mexican chick who keeps telling everyone that she is a chick.
Cisgender Male: Mexican bloke who is fairly certain that he is a bloke.
Cisgender Man: say it with a comma between the two words at parties.
Cisgender Woman: a woman sympathetic to the plight of the Mexican people. She also has a dick.
Female to Male: basic Cock Attachment 101. You knew this one.
FTM: fat tranny mum.
Gender Fluid: see "agender" but packing an even bigger sook
Gender Nonconforming: spewing about own dick forward slash gash.
Gender Questioning: last bloke picked at lunchtime footy.
Gender Variant: depends how warm it is outside (stockings day or not).
Genderqueer: would have to be my Aunty Doris. She's my queen.
"Just bring the sherry flaggon over you fu
Intersex: 120 kg webcam tranny. Good work if you can get it.
Male to Female: basic Cock Annihilation 101. Pass the sherry, I'll do it myself.
MTF: "Mother fuckin Teresa, what is that?"
Neither: Neither? Neither what? Neither of the two sexes? There's 58 now. Try to keep up.
Neutrois: neurotic French chick.
Non-binary: chick who used to work in a library.
Other: Really? "Other?" You can?t pick ONE of the fuckin 58? PISS OFF.
Pangender: fuck knows. Probably Gene-o.
"Wayne you fuckin smelly cu
Trans: not Neil Young's best lp but still pretty fuckin handy.
Trans*: asterisk denotes bonus track.
Trans Female: bloke who wants to be a chick so he hacked his own dick off.
Trans* Female: asterisk denotes hacking still in progress. Almost there. Blood everywhere but you can't fuckin stop now.
Trans Male: obviously, a bloke who bought the Trans LP.
Trans* Male: bloke who bought the Trans LP but didn't know there would be a bonus track.
Trans Man: bloke who swears black and blue that Neil Young's Trans lp is better than the "Reactor" lp from 1981.
Trans* Man: bloke who didn't like the bonus track on Trans that much.
Trans Person: just a person who enjoys the Trans lp. Doesn't have to be a bloke or a chick, nothing to get so hung up about for fucks sake
Trans* Person: person who has been meaning to buy the Trans LP but just hasn't got around to it yet. (It came out in 1982.)
Trans Woman: chick who likes the Trans LP. Jesus, this stuff is just self-explanatory.
Trans* Woman: "Rust Never Sleeps". another good record.
Transfeminine: tranny who wears undies.
Transgender: trying on women's togs but still has a great big huge fuckin cock. And a beard.
Transgender Female: all the above but now walks down to the shops in a wedding dress.
Transgender Male: bloke who puts on a silly voice.
Transgender Man: bloke who puts on a silly voice but still reckons Neil Young is OK.
Transgender Person: fuck knows, my head's spinning at this stage.
Transgender Woman: chick who wants to get into the movies cheaper.
Transmasculine: Probably my brother Trevor. He thinks he's pretty masculine when he's transporting himself around town in his stupid fucken ute.
"Fucken Wayne you fat cu
Transsexual: the original. www.grannytranny.org. Bookmark!
Transsexual Female: a spunk in Thailand. Everywhere else, bloke in a wedding dress.
Transsexual Male: Simple. Bloke in a dress.
Transsexual Man: what? fuck, thought I had the hang of this?
Transsexual Person: tackle lopped off on the cheap but the surgeon fucked it up and now no one knows if bloke or Sheila.
Transsexual Woman: bit of a spunk. Unless Doc Botha did the oppo. (http://ostsplasticsurgery.wix.com/seacruise)
Two-Spirit: ghost with two cocks.
Well, that covers it. Glad to help clear up your raging poof identity crisis.
--Wayne Gunston.