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New Zealand Rugby Team Watch

Dismal Pillock

Simon Poidevin (60)
NZRFU=MORANS. Way to blow $400,000 out your arses, guyz.

Wft is the big deal about this Moaaaarr guy? $400K is a metric fuckload of boots for low decile schools/sausage rolls/scrum machines etc.

FFS, fuck Moaar and save the $$, just pick some other lackey doofus to hold the tackle bags
 

Dan54

Tim Horan (67)
I thinking Mooar is actually someone who gets a lot of credit for how well Crusaders have gone DP, been whispers for a last few years that he was marked for higher coaching. I would take the $00 grand bit with a large grain of salt, a bit like Izzy Folau's $14mill, nothing like an opening offer!!
 

Dismal Pillock

Simon Poidevin (60)
Seeing as the tenured Cantabs completely fucked up the World Cup for the entire nation of New Zealand with their lackadaisical complacency it's time to flush the dunny and get some hunger back in the AB's.

Luckily, this coincides with the dawning of a new Auckland Blues dynasty so all joking aside I FULLY EXPECT, on 2020 Soup rugby form, this to be the first AB side named next test season.

I have highlighted the players in BLUE specifically as ones to watch.

1 Ofa Tuungafasi (rocket 4 Moody, the red and black isnt a lanyard into the AB gold watch vestibule you lazy c**t)
2 Coles. ffs Taylor was RWCWFT
3 Karl Tu’inukuafe
4 Patrick Tuipulotu
5 Tom Robinson(top lineout option, so what if he's a bit shortish, so was Read and he was the #1 target for years. BBBR and Sleepy Whitelock on sabbatical. Pari Pari Parkinson? ffsGTFO)
6 Cane ffs. not that dogshit Scott Barrett speedbump
7 Dalton Papalii with Ardie coming back from injury
8 Akira Ioane OH FUCK YEAH, KFC IS OUT BABY AND MURDER IS IN.
9 A.Fterdavid
10 Stephen Perofeta (rocket 4 Mounga, poms entire RWC gameplan was to find where Mounga was hiding? ffs time to unleash the perofuture of tomorrow today)
11 Reece
12 Laumape
13 Rieko Ioane (rocket 4 Goodhue..... not totally needed but still, keep the dogs hungry)
14 Bridge
15 Beauden Barrett

FUCK YEAHHH

giphy.gif
 

zer0

Jim Lenehan (48)
Not Blue enough.

2. James Parons. F*ck it. If Foster can get the job by lingering around long enough like a bad smell, then so too can Parsons goddammit.
.....
9. Jonathan Ruru. lol. jk. Not even I can put Ruru there. The Palmy Lawyer can retain his position as both team halfback and legal counsel.
.....
11. Caleb Clarke. For his arse. No homo. Maybe a little homo.
12. Tinoai Faiane. Get some real leadership up in here. Guy leads a bunch of drunkards who got waylaid from the Trident Tavern in Onehunga to overcome the dastardly Cantab's and their Death Star team in double secret overtime. Compare and contrast vis-à-vis prior All Black administration of tenured Crusaders who belly flopped against a bunch of Englishmen and their assortment of fancy hats and exotic Scouse and West Country accents.
 

swingpass

Peter Sullivan (51)
Screen Shot 2019-12-24 at 5.47.44 pm.png
thought Dismal might want to know, Ankle surgery to sideline Pitcairn Pirate halfback Jack Gunston until February

Pitcairn Pirate premiership player Jack Gunston will be sidelined until early February after he required surgery on a troublesome ankle.
The versatile back had the operation on Monday after suffering discomfort in the pre-Christmas period with the club deciding it was better for him to have the operation now rather than hoping rest would lead to a recovery.
Gunston has played at least 19 games in every season since 2012 and is expected to resume training with the squad in February.
 

Blue

Andrew Slack (58)
8 Akira Ioane OH FUCK YEAH, KFC IS OUT BABY AND MURDER IS IN.
10 Stephen Perofeta (rocket 4 Mounga, poms entire RWC gameplan was to find where Mounga was hiding? ffs time to unleash the perofuture of tomorrow today)

13 Rieko Ioane (rocket 4 Goodhue... not totally needed but still, keep the dogs hungry)


Always thought you're a bit odd, but I changed my mind.

You are batshit crazy.
 

Lindommer

Steve Williams (59)
Staff member
.......but very, very humorous, and quite entertaining. The Silver Frown didn't appreciate Dismal's contrary point of view and quirkiness so they banned him. I, for one, am quite delighted he's found a home here at G&GR.
 
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