Formula 1

[The torpedo]

Lewis Hamilton secures the pole, Seb P2 by 0.186 seconds. Daniel Ricciardo qualifies 5th. Race starts 4pm AEST

 

[The torpedo]

5-place grid penalties for Grosjean and Palmer for not slowing under yellows. Both will start from the back row

 

[The torpedo]

Antonio Giovinazzi has a 5-place grid penalty for a gearbox change

 

[The torpedo]

Anyone else here?
Anyone?

 

[The torpedo]

Lewis Hamilton wins the Chinese GP. Ricciardo P4

 

[The torpedo]

Fernando Alonso will drive in the Indy 500. Will miss Monaco GP

 

[The torpedo]

Valtteri Bottas score the pole for the Bahrain GP. Daniel Ricciardo P4. Race starts @ 1am AEST

 

[The torpedo]

Seb wins the Bahrain GP. Daniel Ricciardo P5

 

[The torpedo]

Paging Dismal Pillock for his take on F1

 

[Inside Shoulder]

Mate, it's no less boring this year.
Why haven't red bull got the requisite pace?

 

[The torpedo]

Mate, it's no less boring this year.
Why haven't red bull got the requisite pace?

Renault PU is down a bit on Ferrari and Merc.

Plus they had to redesign the chassis a bit after some rule clarifications

they're bringing major chassis upgrades to Spain (and Renault is bringing PU updates to Canada)

 

[Dismal Pillock]

Paging Dismal Pillock for his take on F1

F1? Of course I am an expert on F1.

I wrote the Wikipedia entry for F1. Here it is:

In almost any program for any operating system, the F1 key also serves as the help key. When pressed, it will open the help menu for the program currently in use. For instance, if you are browsing self-soiling granny-tranny octopus tentacle rape grot and click on "F1", a kindly dropbox will promptly descend to inform you that the cops are on their way and you really should torch that fucken hard drove right n

 

[cyclopath]

F1? Of course I am an expert on F1.

I wrote the Wikipedia entry for F1. Here it is:

Which key torches fucken hard drives?

 

[Dismal Pillock]

Which key torches fucken hard drives?

Sorry, you'll have to start a separate thread for that query.

This is the F1 thread.

 

[cyclopath]

Sorry, you'll have to start a separate thread for that query.

This is the F1 thread.

Or I can rename every thread the "Which FN Key Torches FN Hard Drives?"

 

[Dismal Pillock]

Or I can rename every thread the "Which FN Key Torches FN Hard Drives?"

Does not compute.

More from wikipedia:

F keys run from F1 through to F12. There is no FN key. If an FN key is required, please contact your local FN Hewlett Packard call centre (subject line//: "Which FN Key Torches FN Hard Drives?") and await further instructions.

 

[cyclopath]

@The torpedo - are you glad you asked yet?

 

[The torpedo]

@The torpedo - are you glad you asked yet?

Of course I am.

Although Dismal, here's a slightly different question -

What's your take on FORMULA 1 (the sport)?

 

[Spieber]

My wife (Cantonese) dislikes Vettel (understatement) and has just gone into the kitchen to smash a few dishes. Hope he doesn't win tomorrow for my sake. Can now switch back to Force v Lions.

 

[The torpedo]

My wife (Cantonese) dislikes Vettel (understatement) and has just gone into the kitchen to smash a few dishes. Hope he doesn't win tomorrow for my sake. Can now switch back to Force v Lions.

Fuck that, I want him to win! FORZA FERRARI!!!!!

First time since the 2008 French GP that Ferrari have locked out the front row