Not a great article but I need somewhere to put this.
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MasterChef Canine
After weeks of earnest competition, it all came down to the grand finale in the MasterChef kitchen last night. Finalists Audra, Andy and Julia put their best dishes in front of the judges and waited to learn their fate.
Audra plated up first. She engineered a typical fusion of East-West cuisines by putting a whole BBQ chicken through a blender and stirring soy, black bean and fish sauces into the mush. Gary Labrador, licking the sauce from his jowls, said it was 'bloody delicious!' and 'not one bit too salty!'
Andy played it safe with chunks of seasoned sausage mince, warmed up in bacon grease and served on kibble with the juices drizzled over. Roly-poly judge George Staffordshire had to be dragged from the tasting table so that his colleagues could get a taste of the dish. 'You have axcelled yourself!' he told Andy, when he had regained his composure.
Julia took a different tack, basing her dish on some decidedly green slabs of rump steak that had been left in a bag at the bottom of the fridge for ten days. Her approach was 'deceptively simple', said Matt St Bernard-Preston; everyone had been expecting her to cook the meat, and instead she dropped it on the floor and let the judges scrap and scuffle for their share.
Tasting over, it was time for the judges to deliver their scores. Gary awarded all the dishes 11 out of 10, as did George, and Matt followed suit. With the contestants tied on 33 points, the judges called for a sudden-death cook-off.
And on it went, late into the night....