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The Big V

Discussion in 'Everything Else' started by RugbyReg, May 10, 2010.

  1. MrTimms Ken Catchpole (46)

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    Funny stuff.

    But Cyclo is right, do what I say. And the bit about frozen peas, buy a couple of packs and rotate through them, while one is on the boys the other is refreezing.


    Sent from my Transformer TF101 using Tapatalk
  2. Gagger Nick Farr-Jones (63)

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    Cyclo, the job you did on me at the Lord Nelson the other night after the G&GR drinks is coming unstuck, I think
  3. cyclopath Phil Waugh (73)

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    Mate, my whole week came unstuck after that day and night! :tard:
  4. RugbyReg Stirling Mortlock (74)

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    quick question.

    How long does the pain last? Its been a week and them jewells are still a little painful.
  5. mark_s Chilla Wilson (44)

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    I heard 50 years.and thats if it was done properly
    Cutter likes this.
  6. Jnor Peter Fenwicke (45)

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    Must have missed that bit (or I hope I did, I'm not sure I'd remember)
  7. MrTimms Ken Catchpole (46)

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    Can't help you there Reg, after my adventure, it took well over a month or more.
  8. RugbyReg Stirling Mortlock (74)

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    I really should add my story here as it was an interesting one. I'll save it for when I am not on my mobile but will get the juices flowing by informing you of my surgeon's name. Dr Beaver.
    Sully likes this.
  9. spooony Ron Walden (29)

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    When I was a senior in high school we had to make a video and had to have blood packs. The best blood packs are made from condoms. We had the following on the checkout counter: 1 Box of Trojan Magnum condoms, 2 Bottles of Corn oil, 4 Bottles of red food color, 2 Super 8 video cassettes and 1 Roll of duct tape. I have never before gotten weirder looks.
    Schadenfreude likes this.
  10. cyclopath Phil Waugh (73)

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    Is there something you're not telling us about yourself, Regina?
  11. RugbyReg Stirling Mortlock (74)

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    I came very close..
  12. suckerforred Chilla Wilson (44)

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    As a female of the species let me congraduate you for this thread. First as an informed discussion (some more informed then others), and second for the guys among you to have the guts to step up and take responsibility.

    Pfitzy - I had a similar experience with Implanon as you poor wife, and trust me from her side it is not plesent either.

    Just count yourselves lucky that you can make the decision regarding this aspect of contraception. Being a woman who does not want children (never has and that is another big long thread), I am not 'allowed' to have surgical/permanent intervention as I am not quite old enough (still of child bearing age), but to old to safely have children (work that one out), and, wait for it, am not married.

    Anyhow - RugbyReg, where's your story?
  13. spooony Ron Walden (29)

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  14. RugbyReg Stirling Mortlock (74)

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    Ok, so I went in on a Friday arvo, drove myself as they said i'd be able to drive home ok.

    The shaving experience, I must say, the night before was ... interesting. Went through a HELL of a lot of shaving cream.

    Anyway, back to the procedure. I must say it was a little off-putting laying on a table in a little suburban doctor's theatre, with my prickly junk out as a couple of middle age nurses talked about what their children were up to that weekend. Nothing like how I imagined. The fact it was one of the nurses first time was somewhat offputting. She was knowledgeable enough to ask to the other nurse that "after the needle, the doctor will want to wait 10 or 15 minutes won't he?" To which the reply was "No, Dr Beaver likes to get going straight away".

    HANG ON! DON'T I GET A SAY IN THIS? LET'S NOT RUSH THIS THING!

    Anyway, so Dr Beaver comes in and gets started straight away. He's a Reds fans, knows I work for the QRU and is very chatty. I am a little less chatty as, surprise surprise, the needle really hasn't taken effect just yet. But he continues, and the first side is relatively straight forward. He's still chatting away and moves to the 2nd side. Chatting, chatting, chatting.commenting... murmuring..silent...I'll let the experts talk of the procedure, but basically he couldn't get a could grip on my vas deferens and it kept slipping out, preventing him from sealing it, or whatever. He had to making additional incisions to get to other areas. Meanwhile, I'm sweating up a storm and every tug I'm feeling all the way up my gut.

    Eventually he finishes and he informs me "now I'm not entirely sure that 2nd one was the vas deferens, so I've taken a sample and will send it away for testing"!

    ok...

    So I drive my shitty little manual car home, cringing every time I change gears. I get home, parking horribly, crawl up to bed and collapse calling for the first lot of frozen peas. The swelling actually stayed for quite a while, particularly on the 2nd side. Then it went down again, and then came back worse than before. I was packing a cricket ball down there, it shape, colour and feel.

    Move forward 3 months later, and the required 12 (or so) 'releases', I provided another sample (which is a story all in itself) and have just found out that the results are inconclusive. Need to provide another sample in a month, after a few more 'releases'.

    Look, I know this is a lot of TMI, but hey, it's a vasectomy thread. What do you expect?
    Gagger likes this.
  15. Scarfman Knitter of the Scarf

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    The first "release" isn't a whole lot of fun, though, is it? It's a bit like seeing if you can make your balls explode.

    I was the same as you, Reg, thinking that something must have gone wrong because it was hurting for longer than they said. But then the pain eventually went away.
  16. Jnor Peter Fenwicke (45)

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    Jesus I hope they've found a better way tto do this when I get to experience it :eek:
  17. suckerforred Chilla Wilson (44)

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    Already out there, but only registered for use in pigs. The porcine variety that is, not the human variety. ;)
  18. sonny crockett Allen Oxlade (6)

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    A notable Brisbane Premier Grade or first grade hooker then and a sometime rep for Qld had his big V done on a Thursday morning, trained that night, played for his club that Saturday. His nuts looked pretty ordinary after training on Thursday night, and I think he was beyond the pain by Saturday. Tough guy though. A builder I know had his done on a Friday morning and then laid 8 inche (quite heavy) Besser Blocks all day that Friday. Whipped his nuts out in the afternoon, looked like he had been kicked by several horses, never have I seen a darker shade of black.
  19. cyclopath Phil Waugh (73)

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    As the performer of many,many vasectomies, nothing is a more sure fire way to end up with a couple of eggplants in the pants than IGNORING THE ADVICE ABOUT TAKING IT EASY FOR A FEW DAYS AFTERWARDS AND AVOIDING STRENUOUS ACTIVITY. I tell all my patients a dozen times before the procedure, so if it happens, and that is why, they find it hard to say they weren't warned.
    Reg's story is why I don't do them under local anaesthetic usually. I have not had any significant problems since making that change.
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  20. mark_s Chilla Wilson (44)

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    I am a broken record on this, there are other long term options which (so far) are proving effective for us - I have posted on one of them earlier in this thread. No one is getting a knife near my nuts while I am conscious, but good luck to all those who are braver than I.
    Moses likes this.

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