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Tuesday’s Rugby News

Tuesday’s Rugby News

Tuesday’s Rugby News has Cheika talking 6-0, no analysis, playmaker selection, Ricky Stuart and Gareth Southgate, players upset at stupid journo questions and Canadians living up to stereotype.


Michael Cheika and David Pocock post match press conference

Cheika vs England, Part 1

Michael ‘Morpheus’ Cheika is a ‘believer’ in his Wallabies team, telling the press in Japan that he finds the chatter about England’s 6-0 record against the Wallabies as ‘irrelevant’ going into the game.

“I think it’s irrelevant, really,” said Cheika, according to the SMH. “There is reasons, I’m not trying to avoid it, but why go back and talk about all those games?

“I talked about those games in those press conferences after those games and then they’re done with and we’re onto the next thing. Looking backwards is only going to give you a sore neck. We’ve got opportunities this week and we’ve got to take them.

“We’ll be ready, there is no doubt about that. I’m just a believer. Call me a sucker. I believe in my lads. I know there’s other people who won’t give us much of a chance but I believe that when you believe in yourself you are much closer to being able to create history.”

Cheika, who went on to tell the press that he spends the time flying around in sewers in a hovercraft he calls the ‘Nebuchadnezzar’, admitted he don’t have time to actually watch the tape of England playing some he should be doing.

“Don’t really have [an analysis of England’s style], mate,” Cheika said.

“Lots of respect but I’m not a big analyser of the opposition. I’m always telling my coaches not to watch the opposition so much. They watch too much footage of the opposition. I’m interested in our blokes, our team and our analysis so that it can help us be better.”

Cheika

Milk Chief In White Camp

Going on from the analysis chat, Cheika also responded to a question as to why he and the selectors kept changing flyhalves.

“Building from quite a serious illness it takes time for him to get up to the levels that he needs to,” said Cheika of Christian Lealiifano (via the SMH). “I think he’s done an absolutely incredible job. I’m not going to throw him out there in every minute of every game and say, ‘go slug it out’. Throughout the whole season [Toomua and Lilo] have shared time in that spot.” Cheika thought Toomua’s outing against Georgia was ‘solid’.

Cheika also fueled the comments of today’s news by admitting that he’s not thinking about what he or his assistants are going to do if they lose in the quarters.

“I’m only thinking about today,” Cheika said. “Actually you’d get on pretty well with my Mrs, she’s always asking what’s going on tomorrow or next week or the week after and I never tell her because I want to enjoy today [Ain’t that the truth!!! – Ed]. I’ll back myself to do whatever and I don’t really care about later on.”

And finally – Canberra Raiders coach Ricky Stuart, fresh off losing to the Roosters like the Wallabies lost to the All Blacks, has flown over to Japan to observe how Eddie Jones runs England. Yeah this is happening.

Cheika, who the SMH says is good mates with Stuart, thinks the whole idea is a bit weird. Cheika, who is friends with England national soccer team coach Gareth South gate, reckons it’d also be weird if he had Southgate in his setup.

“I’m friends with Gareth Southgate and I don’t know if I’d be wanting him in here the week that we’re playing England,” Cheika said.

“It must be weird for the players having an Aussie, because Ricky is a legend. He’s a dual international and a tough man. Had a great season with the Raiders this year. They played such good footy. It was a very tough grand final they played in. I’d say it might be a bit weird for them.”

Lukhan Tui, Wally, & Scott Higginbotham

Journo Jokes

Wallabies players have shown their frustration at being asked ‘stupid’ questions being asked by Australian rugby journalists, with Lukhan Sunk-Loto and Tolu Latu scoffing at two questions asked.

According to rugby.com.au, Sunk-Loto didn’t tale kindly to a – let’s be honest – pretty boring question from journos. Asked why he believed England would beat Australia, Sunk-Loto responded:

“Because we can, why not?,” he said.

“We all believe it, we’re not just going to sit here and go, ‘Oh, don’t think we believe it,’ of course we can. We all believe that we can do whatever we want to do, if we put our minds to it.”

Turning to the journos, Sunk-Loto said:

“Do you believe we can beat England?”

“Not sure,” said the journos.

“Really?,” Sunk-Loto replied, “That’s your problem then. We believe we can beat them.”

And then, an English journo asked Latu if Cheika was a “bully”.

“Stupid question,” he said.

“To ask it, I don’t know, it’s different for yous guys and different for us.  For us, it comes across as a stupid question so that’s why we’re all laughing.

“Obviously, you’re asking us a question that we think is a complete joke so if you’re going to ask us questions like that, we’ll take it as a joke and throw it back at you.”

“To us, he’s our head coach, of course he cares, he cares about each and every one of us. Simple as that.”

Supporting Latu’s point, Sunk-Loto answered:

“It takes it off us, he is putting himself out there to be shot, he’s protecting us as every good coach would do,” he said.

“Not going to let your players hang out to dry, we’d all do the same for each other.”

Stay tuned to GAGR’s Daily Rugby News, where we criticise hardworking rugby journalists while we facetiously rename players after similar sounding early 00s failed nu-metal bands

canada clean up rwc typhoon

Cleaning Canadians

Fresh from having their final group game against Namibia called off due to the typhoon, ESPN reports that the Canadians instead used their time to help clean up after the disaster.

The Canadians were set to play Namibia at Kamaishi Recovery Stadium, a stadium built in one of the areas worst affected by the 2011 tsunami.

Eliminated from the tournament, a few of the players decided to stay on to help clean up.

“Four of us are staying on tomorrow to do a community barbecue,” said captain and Chiefs player Tyler Ardron.

“There’s a bunch of Canadian guys that have rented a house here, made it a ‘Canada House’, so we’ll do whatever we can to help.

“We were hoping that we would just go out and mingle, interact and just get to know some people but it looks like we might have other things to pitch in.

“What we want to do today, if we can, is get out in the community and help. We’ve been hosted so well. We want to give back all we can.”

  • Who?

    For those who didn’t read my comment on the Italian Draw article…
    .
    Cheika, being well known as not watching much footage, responded to the reports from the games over the weekend with the following:
    “England had nothing on the weekend – failed to dominate the contact, the breakdown, couldn’t win their set piece, did nothing on attack. Couldn’t even get on the scoreboard!!! We’ve got this…”
    :-P
    .
    Though I agree with him it’s weird to have Sticky over there with Eddie this week. I get why he’d go to Eddie not Cheik – more to learn! But just an odd week…
    .
    And well done to the Canadian players. :-)

    • Yup, absolutely well done to the Canadian players.

      And I’d like to say well done to the fans during the moment’s silence before the games on Sunday. You could have heard a pin drop… maybe not onto the soggy pitch but it was really quiet. I’m used to that from smaller rugby crowds but it was impressive from a crowd that size. I was also watching with a friend who is a football (soccer) fan, and was stunned by just how respectful the rugby fans were.

      • Bernie Chan

        EP…I was up in Yokohama watching the Socceroos play the Blue Samurai in a WC Qualifier immediately after the Ash Wednesday bushfires in VIC. The minutes silence pre-game astounded us Aussie fans (post game it appeared that every Japanese fan who spoke English came up and said “thanks for coming…see you in Australia for the next game…”)…it was silence, not a murmur to be heard. No one does it better when it comes to showing respect, and I hope it rubs off onto our rugby fans.
        The ‘old school’ guy in me longs for the days when the fans were quiet for goal kicks etc etc…

    • Kiwi rugby lover

      Hahahaha well said mate, ABs played just as shit.
      That was great by the Canadians

      • Custard Taht

        I don’t think you are giving the Italian Defence enough credit, it was even better the boy Georgians.

  • Nutta

    I was a bit bemused by the whole press conference thing. A mob of folk who make a living finding a crease in a persons comment so they can manufacture some column inches that please their audience from a tenuous idea (at best) vs 3 guys who try to live by a facta non verba approach to life. My dad used to sometimes say ‘Don’t be surprised when a sheep grows wool Boy.’ Yep.

  • Kiwi rugby lover

    Thanks Nick. And so it starts. Going to be an interesting week as the different coaches and players get to talk to the press. You can just see the press salivating at this and bringing up the stupid questions to get a bite. Well done to those players treating them like the knobs they so often are.
    TBH I don’t think a lot of the stuff spouted is true and the coaches actually wind up the press as much as anything. Good for a laugh but I’ll probably be sick of it by Thursday

    Well done Canada. What a bunch of legends

  • Brumby Runner

    Cheika again admitted that he doesn’t watch or analyse the opposition, but this time he says he tells his Assistants to lay off as well. Then, in the same interview he admits to watching League and the Raiders/grand final in particular. Is there something wrong with his priorities?

    • Kiwi rugby lover

      Mate I reckon there’s a fair bit of gamesmanship in his comments.

      • Custard Taht

        Or is it the truth…..the on field performance and tactics of the wallabies probably support what he says.

        • Kiwi rugby lover

          Mate I’m in 2 minds. I just don’t understand how anyone at this level can’t know that analysis of the opposition is critical. I do agree the on field performance indicates it is likely but it beggars belief in this day and age

        • Custard Taht

          I was up in the air about it, but just can’t ignore the supporting evidence anymore. It is definitely crazy stuff, but I am of the belief that with Cheika, what you see is what you get.

        • laurence king

          Well, we’ll find out on the weekend. I do think that the boys have got it in them, and if anybody can get them up the one game, it would probably be Cheika. I think CLL will play and our guys will probably batter the crap out of the Poms win,lose or draw.

    • Mica

      No way they don’t watch the opposition to find weaknesses and develop a plan of attack. This happens in under 10s club sport.

      • Brumby Runner

        And you’ve seen those plans of attack which presumably are varied game to game to best beat the living daylights out of the opposition?

    • GeorgiaSatellite

      Let’s hope it doesn’t mean Pocock will play “6 again”.

    • Patrick

      BR I’m so over Cheika it isn’t funny but of course he watches the matches. Maybe he’s drunk or off his head when he does, because I agree you wouldn’t know it from the way we play, but he isn’t actually an idiot. He’s just a very poor selector, a good but limited coach and a quite limited manager.

      • Custard Taht

        I watch matches too….The missus then promptly takes them away from me.

  • Missing Link

    Cheika and his coaches may not watch the opposition, but there will be analysts sifting through game footage, there will be software used to analyse patterns and work out areas that can be exploited and this would be reported back to Cheika and the coaching panel so they can work on it at training and execute it in the game. I know it’s the bumbling ARU/RA but no tier 1 team could skimp in this area in this day and age, Cheika can’t be that dense, he is just foxing the media, even the opposition know he’s taking the P1

    • Custard Taht

      But where is the in game evidence that the wallabies attack an opponents weakness?

      • Missing Link

        That’s a fair comment mate. Maybe they’re not really good at it or it’s difficult to exploit weaknesses against strong teams like SA and NZ who we play most often. I would really be surprised if there wasn’t significant video analysis going on. pre and post match briefings with video projection and players should be boarding planes with ipads so they’re watching techniques, game plans, attack and defense patterns during their flight to the game. Kind of like the stuff Kafe does or used to do on fox rugby whatever it’s called these days.

        • Custard Taht

          I agree, you would have to think they do and, that it is what you say.

          I don’t know what is worse, not doing it, or doing it and basically getting zero benefit from it. Either way, it is a sad indictment on the coaching staff.

          But will say this, nothing would surprise me in regard to Cheika.

  • Custard Taht

    I don’t know what an ass clown is. I don’t know if it is a clown with an ass for a red nose, or an ass for a red wig, or simply just a clown that juggles asses….And I am sure not going to Google it!

    But regardless of what an ass clown is, I am certain of one thing. They would have one trick and that trick would be shit, with or without gas expulsion.

    • Patrick

      Definitely google at work material

      • Custard Taht

        True story…..I had never heard of Blue Waffles. A female work colleague mentioned them, and when I asked her what they were, she said google them. I thought nothing of it, so googled them on my government computer;

        a) It traumatised me
        b) I was issued with a please explain.

        • Patrick

          I hope you brought her a drink! She sounds like a really cool colleague :).

        • Custard Taht

          One of the coolest chicks I’ve met, she is a cracker.

    • From NooZealand

      I did and it is not funny.

      • Custard Taht

        I won’t lie, there is a part of me that is intrigued!

      • Parker

        It’s like a rodeo clown but in a sodomy bar for when someone gets bucked off before their time.

        • From NooZealand

          That’s ugly.

  • Hoss

    Afternoon all.

    The http://www.yourwallabysquad.com is now live. Your chance to pick your XXIII to take on the Poms.

    Will it be Cheika last hoorah, who makes up the loose trio, who starts at 10?

    I look forward to your selections !!

    Are we any chance at rolling the Mother Country?

    Who knows, but I will be cheering my guts out

    I will release the results Thursday morning.

    Go Gold

    • Ads

      Done mate. Who knows with bloody 12 and 13. I picked JOC 12 and TK for 13 for what its worth. A qtr final probably aint the place to stuff around though.

      • Damo

        I’ve gone for the same 12 and 13, but seriously, picking the backline is still like solving a Rubik’s Cube. The back row and the mid field must, must, must unsettle Farrell and Ford and shut off the flow of ball, including contestable kicks, to the England back 3. I think TK will be more effective in that. Of course the success of this will depend on our tight 5 smashing and driving back everything that moves in the narrow channels. If Itoji is man of the match it means we have lost badly. In my view the game plan and the attitude still overrides marginal selection decisions. My advice would be to watch the Japan v Scotland game about 40 times this week.

        • Darrin Briggs

          He is my plan to unsettled Farrel and Ford I would play kerevi at 12 and TK at 13 with JOC on the wing interchanging with 12 and 13. Get them both to relentlessly smashed them and tie them up. we have tried to outplay them for the past 6 games and it hasn’t worked try something different.

        • Patrick

          Then again with Foley we weren’t going to even if we had Horan and BOD in the centres

        • Patrick

          Happily there are no markets in BoG because I reckon Itoje would be favourite!

      • Hoss

        I hear you mate. I went Toomua at 12 and Samu at 13 with JOC on the pine (with Sanchez and Gilbert). Forwards I went slipper Latu 7A’s Arnold FKA Dempsey Hooper and Pocock. With Sio Ueleses Thor Rodda Naisarani.

        4 years and 50 years since last RWC and I have no clue who is our beat 23 and I reckon I’m not alone.

        • Custard Taht

          Well, Cheika certainly doesn’t.

        • onlinesideline

          mate agree with you re Slips – has over taken Sio in my book
          also agree ALOT re Dempsey. Isi is mad gain line but maybe thats all.
          Jack is slipperry and smart (there is a joke in there somewhere) and a match winner. He seems strong enough too for the big gig and he can jump.

          JOC is a starter for mine. We need 60 minutes of him minimum stepping , weaving, making opposition nervous. He has tonne of big match experience and wins matches. I would put Toomua on pine and split Lilo and him 50 minutes and 30 minutes, unless Lilo is killing it.

      • Patrick

        Me too

      • laurence king

        Similar, except Toomua instead of JOC

    • Greg

      I think we need a strategy that helps Farrel deliver his signature shoulder to the head. He knows he wants to do it…. he just needs more opportunity.

    • GeorgiaSatellite

      I only refer to it as the ‘mother country’ if I’m omitting a word from the middle. Sorry Keith.

      • Keith Butler

        ‘‘Twas to be expected. But I will maintain my stiff upper lip and taken it on my lose flabby chin.

        • Custard Taht

          If the Poms beat the Wallabies, I will be swinging low, sweat chariot for the Poms to win it all.

  • Hoss

    Well Ireland are officially rooted for Saturday. ‘to tatou nigel’ has been appointed. Game over. At least we have Garces and we all know the French hate the English, our stocks are rising.

    • UTG

      I see your “at least we have Garces” and raise you “we have Skeen.”

      • Bernie Chan

        Nothing trumps Skeen as TMO….nothing…you win!

      • Hoss

        Hopefully Skeen watches Marler closely at scrum time. He ‘bores in’ more than AGL on a fracking expedition.

  • Bernie Chan

    So…for laughs, WR has decided that Ben Skeen will once again be the human highlight for the ENG v AUS QF…. Jerome Garces has the whistle (better than Poite…).

  • Bernie Chan

    Well done to the Canadian rugby squad…..if you want to visit a place that feels like a very polite Oz, with just a tad of accent, then the west coast of Canada is for you. For food…go to Quebec…the French influence is positive.

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Hopes to play David Pocock in the inevitable biopic. Lifelong fan of whoever Jarrad Hayne is currently playing for.

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