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Crusaders (NZ) Rugby Team Thread.

The Crusaders Rugby Football Team

  • I begrudgingly respect their success

    Votes: 6 30.0%
  • I do not

    Votes: 4 20.0%
  • I hate them

    Votes: 5 25.0%
  • We all hate them

    Votes: 7 35.0%
  • I welcome their tumble into mediocrity

    Votes: 4 20.0%
  • I prefer that Auckland team, you know, "The Auckland Blues"

    Votes: 2 10.0%
  • The disintegration of the Cantabs empire gives me a stiffy so big it blots out the motherfucking sun

    Votes: 5 25.0%
  • They had a good run but enough is enough

    Votes: 4 20.0%
  • Commentator Tony Johnstone having to witness their decline + Blues ascension = Major Stiffy Time

    Votes: 6 30.0%
  • I like pole

    Votes: 5 25.0%

  • Total voters
    20

Dismal Pillock

Steve Williams (59)
wft unbelievable, this forum doesnt even have a dedicated Crusaders thread.

Time to start chronicling the wither and crumble of the Death Star. Huge chunks of rampart shattering on the concrete below.

cantabscatmeme.jpg
 
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Dismal Pillock

Steve Williams (59)
cantabs_zpssb6mcwjg.png

"Attention, six-toed Cantabrian daughters of tomorrow's suns. It is I, Razor, your Beloved and Benevolent Leader. We are gathered here today to pay homage to a beloved son of Christchurch named Paul Williams. Blessed Be His Fruit, Holy Be His TMO Vag Badge. Yes, this brave and wise TMO has presided over yet another epochal weekend in Crusaders folklore.

"First, on Friday he TMO drone piloted the Crusaders 1st XV to yet another victory over the stupid boganfaced Chiefs. Then, in what surely will be writ large in Crusaders folklore, he boarded an aeroplane to Auckland and the very next day he single-handedly cancelled out the Blues Alltime Greatest Try with a swashbucklingly dismissive wave of the hand from his TMO booth.

"In closing, let us join hands and pray Mr Williams is in the TMO box for this weekend's clash against the hated Jaffas. Surely he can pilot us home to glory once again. Blessed Be The Duelling Dicks, Mr Williams, and Let The Power of Deans Compel You Forever And Ever, Amen"
 

Pfitzy

Jason Little (69)
wft unbelievable, this forum doesnt even have a dedicated Crusaders thread.


They get bitched about enough in other threads.

And no wonder, because the impression in general is the refereeing brotherhood as a whole is deeply invested in finding out the contents of Razor's intestines via his rectal passage.
 

Dismal Pillock

Steve Williams (59)
LOL@Mounga, he of the Rolls Royce pack, who comes out in the media boasting he "plays better under pressure" yet all evidence suggests, in the insanely rare junctures for the Cantabs and AB's that he actually faces any scoreboard pressure, he promptly goes to pieces and shits the bed.

Dude.

Shut up.
 

Dismal Pillock

Steve Williams (59)
Jesus, the loss to the Chiefs was Beavis Drummonds 100th match??

Feels like he's been riding the pine for about 2 seasons with the occasional garbage time cameo.
 

Dismal Pillock

Steve Williams (59)
cantabs_zpssb6mcwjg.png

"Greetings, Anglo Saxon Children of The Republic of South Gilead. It is I, Razor, your coach, your Vishnu, your Lotus, The Love of Your Lives.

"We ran out the B-team tonight against the stupid bogans of Hamilton, bit of blood through the legs for the squaddies. Didnt catch the final score myself, no fucks given.

"Anyway, let us look forward to next weekend visitors, yes, the auld enemy, the hated and brainless and fat Aucklanders. As expected this season, they've reverted back to type, that being, braindead and useless and stupid and ugly. God only knows what their current losing streak is, who cares, they're fat and their mummies dress them funny. Righto, peace out, Razorman."
 

Dismal Pillock

Steve Williams (59)
cantabs_zpssb6mcwjg.png

"Good Evening, Blessed Virgins of A Thousand Lancaster Parkers. It is I, Razor, your Patriach, your Sentinel, your Private Dancer.

"Calm and Order has been restored here upon The Death Star. Our local stormtroopers have brutally crushed the dreams of some stupid children from 'Hamilton', which I'm reliably informed is located in the North Island of New Zealand. They are of foreign blood and they talk funny and they know not of our ways.

"In this years Coronationary National Final, our hometown heroes just followed their usual 2021 game plan. That being, cheating and infringing and giving away penalties with no-fucks-given and trusting that the idiotic enemy team would be too thick and disorganised to capitalise on it. It worked a treat. Again. As it has all season. Blessed Be The Red and Black Adder".
 

Dismal Pillock

Steve Williams (59)
cantabs_zpssb6mcwjg.png


"UNDER HIS EYE, THE UNIMAGINABLE HAS HAPPENED. THE UNTHINKABLE. THE UNCONSCIONABLE. YOU MUST KNOW SURELY OF THAT WHICH I SPEAK OF. FOR IT IS THE UNSPEAKABLE. IT IS THAT WHICH CAN NEVER BE MENTIONED. LET US NEVER SPEAK OF THIS DAY EVER, EVER, EVER AGAIN. IN EXECUTIVE SUMMARY, MAY THIS UNHOLY DAY ROT IN AN ETERNAL INFAMY OF PESTILENCE, PLAGUE AND DISGUST. BLESSED BE THE VAG. MURDER BE THE ONE-EYE. I THINK I'M GOING TO BE SICK NOW".
 

waiopehu oldboy

Phil Waugh (73)
Christchurch Stadium update:

1. Budget has blown out by ~$160Mn.
2. To get back under budget Council has voted to reduce capacity from 25K permanent + up to 5K temporary to 20K permanent + ? temporary. Maybe.
3. Chair of Project Management group has quit. Replacement tba in September. Maybe. If they can find someone by then.
4. Points 2. & 3. above are utterly, utterly unrelated. That's UNRELATED, y'all.
 

waiopehu oldboy

Phil Waugh (73)
So they went away & did a bit of a re-design & some work on the costings. It may now look something like this:

IMG_1129.JPG

Capacity back to 30K which is what it needs to be. I'm still not convinced it needs a roof, hopefully they can bin that when the costs start blowing out. Which they absolutely will esp for anything that's imported: we have suppliers who are now paying four- to five times their pre-Covid shipping costs. Also there's a shortage of skilled construction workers.

 
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