SALE SALE SALE EVERYTHING MUST GO

[RugbyReg]

Sorry, not quite, but there are some pretty decent sales going on for Oz Rugby S14 gear here (and I don't mean Reds players):

http://www.merchandiseshop.com.au/index.php

Click on REDS and go to crazy bargains. Its all teams.

 

[Newb]

nothing in my size :crybaby

 

[RugbyReg]

I am eyeing of some kids Reds jerseys in anticipation of being able to replace the Waratah jerseys my lads asked for for Christmas.

 

[eddo]

yeh.. Nothing for any normal human beings.

S or 3XL.. Rodney Blake is stocking up

 

[Moses]

Can you get this one signed by Nathan Sharpe?

 

[fatprop]

yeh.. Nothing for any normal human beings.

agreed, Force and Reds gear :tard

 

[Pfitzy]

Its on sale for a reason 8)

 

[Dismal Pillock]

Gunston Oil

For sale: Oil Rig.

$400 million O.N.O

All the fat pricks currently on the starboard deck? No
problem. This Gunston oil rig will roll with the punches.

Trampoline is high and dry.

Fun for all the family.

$6,000 bucks. (the basement may be a bit wet)

This oil rig will arrive at your front door
in VERY FUCKING CLEAN condition.

GUARANTEED.

GUNSTON GUARANTEE.

$800 bucks.

**comes in ventilated crate**

BBQ works fine.

Dunny got a bit blocked up. It's fixed now.

50 thousand bucks

Don't worry about that bright-looking bit.

It's just a safety flare so planes don't hit the oil rig at night.

Safety first!

GUNSTON GUARANTEE.

50 million squid.


















NORTH SEA SPECIAL

A steal at 2,000 bucks.

All the mod cons, this one.

"Oil", etc.

Don't panic, this one'll go beaut once the tide comes back in.

Be patient.

Pay now, wait later.

400 million bucks.

Righto.

- Aunty Doris Gunston (Gunston Oil)

​

 

[cyclopath]

G U N S T O N O I L = Lou Stoning or Lust In Goon, either of which might explain The Pillock.
*Code cracked*.
*Mind blown*.

It's like the fucking De Vunci Code.

 

[waiopehu oldboy]

^^^^^^^ Lou Stoning oblique reference to the late great Lou Reed? Lust in goon oblique reference to the can't believe he's not late but still great Iggy Pop when frontman for the Stooges? Almost makes sense in a late-60's/ early-70's kinda way....................

 

[Dismal Pillock]

Gidday, fellers.

Gene-o here.

Got a few poodle dogs to sell to you today.

Let's take a look at the wide range of quality
pedigree poodles we have on offer for you today.

POODLES (DOGS)

Quality poodle. Neutered him myself. Don't ask how.

$2995.95.

Pay now.

Quality Dog. Poncey hairdo but still quality.
$4,995.95.

Rare 4th generation dog (poodle).
800 fuckin' bucks* for this one.

* extra $295.95 if you'd like the carrier crate ventilated.

Pay now, Japan.

Bugger me.

$8,995.95

How cute! Sadly, if nobody buys this dog
before the end of the month I will be left
with little choice other than to run the little
freak over with my Holden Torana.

It's up to you to save this dog!

Quality dog, 8 thousand bucks

Black poodle. Has a huge dong. For breeding.

$699.95. You touched it, it's fuckin' yours now.​

 

[Dismal Pillock]

Gidday and welcome to.......

Gunston Tanks

I am your customer representative, Trevor Gunston's the name.

This is not a tank, it's my ute and no, you can't bloody well have it.


Gunston Tanksforsale is a limited liability company dealing
in motorised agents of death, or, in your language, tanks.

We sell tanks and surplus military vehicles to:​

• The defence industry.
• The porn industry
• The rich buggers
• The foreigners.
  
• The other assorted warmongering psychos.

We have a number of years experience in selling Military vehicles to customers worldwide.

Enquiries from overseas are welcome.

We offer a vehicle finding and brokerage service. You want the 1963 Panzar 211F?
We will find the thing, hiff out whatever dick is driving it and make it yours.

NO QUESTIONS ASKED.

GUNSTON GURANTEE.

Right then, al qaeda psychos, let's get down to business and have
a look at the fine array of tanks we have on offer for you today.​

As you can see, this one's still parked up in downtown Cronulla. Yours to pick up, $50,000,000 O.N.O.

Nevermind that smoke, Gene-o was having a bit of a fry-up indoors.

50,000 bucks for this one. It's somewhere in the Ukraine,
you'll have to find it. Good luck, ya stupid commie nutjob.

Team Gunston Aeroplane​

$100 O.N.O

Pretty much a death trap.








​

​

​

​

Panzer TG 211​

​

Bit of fire damage to this one, don't worry though, it'll wash right off. $200 o.n.o.
Don't worry about that kraut up there peeping through the wee hole either. We had him shot.

Throw in another 10 bucks and we'll chuck the dead kraut in too.

Authentic Patton T-28 Tank, as used in the war. This one runs
on diesel, 2 previous owners, both non-smokers, no pets.

400 million dollars. One of a kind.

SPONSOR​

​

​

GUNSTON HALL.​

​

THE #1 Hall to buy all your acid from.

GO GUNSTON.​

GO HALL.​

GO GUNSTON HALL.​

​

DROP IN, TUNE ON, TURN IN. ​

​

SOMETHING LIKE THAT ANYWAY.

Coupla flat tires, apart from that this one is right as rain. Get the bike
pump onto it, bit of elbow grease and you'll be back up the front in no time.

300 million bucks. Pay up, Attila.
​

 

[Dismal Pillock]

ALSO FOR SALE​

​

Actual size Monaro.​

$250,000​

​

​

We painted it with these:​

​

​

​

Each jar is the same size as a 44-gallon drum. GETPAINTING hashtag #paint​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

Yep, you can soon see why the you-know-who lost the you-know-what. ​

​

The can lids will pick up the footie reception with a bit of a twiddle though. Propane gas tank, chimney works fine, she's as warm as toast indoors.​

​

200 million krugerand.​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

SPONSOR​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

Oops, sorry, was playing a bit of open highway "chicken" with ​

Gene-o, he was driving the tank, I was in the ute. His loss your gain.​

​

Another pick-up, I'm afraid, you'll find this racey number on the Alice ​

Springs Highway, roughly 3,200 km's northwest of Woolongong.​

​

​

$300 Australian dollars. And a bag of chips. And maybe any nudee mags if you got em'.​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

Yes, yes, I know. It's appalling. Absolutely fucking shocking. The gun turret is too bloody short!​

Maybe you could tape an extension on or something. Take it down to your local blacksmith.​

​

We'll cut you a deal on this one, $99,995.00 while stocks last.​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

312 or 342? Not a problem Gene-o'll dab a bit of paint on there before you come in to collect it.​

​

​

$350 million for this one. Hitler once pissed on it.​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

Those wheels might look a bit small but they swell up once you start the engine.​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

Righto, get in quick, these things are flying out the door. ​

​

Gunston Tanks, your #1 choice for bombing some ​

poor bastard halfway to Sixpackistan and back.​

​

- Trev.​

​

 

[Dismal Pillock]

Gunston Oil

For sale: Oil Rig.

$400 million O.N.O

https://www.theguardian.com/environ...nto-ocean-for-months-but-incident-kept-secret

 

[wamberal]

I thought you might be selling the ARU?

 

[brokendown]

you couldn't sell it as a going concern!