All-Time Crim 1st XV

[Dan54]

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https://japantoday.com/category/cri...for-refusing-to-pay-taxi-fare-punching-driver

Another assault charge in the offing.

Still won't crack the starting XV unless he actually KIDNAPS or KILLS the taxi driver.

Something to think about for next time, George.

to be fair on George this not the first time he has tried to crack the team DP, so maybe he thought being has up a second time he may of got on the bench at least!!

 

[Dismal Pillock]

selectors deliberating long into the night but G.Smith looking likely to supplant Lauaki as loosie bench option.

OOPS, sorry, wrong pic, so sorry, my mistake.

 

[The torpedo]

Paddy Jackson and Stuart Olding both faced court today on their rape charges: http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-northern-ireland-42874775

Also worth noting that Olding is a fullback

 

[Hound]

Could we add in the Aussie cricket leadership team as consultants


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Dismal Pillock]

the following have been added to the staff as equipment/ball maintenance consultants:​

• David Warner​
• Steve Smith​
• Cameron Bancroft​
• Darren Lehmann​
• a few shady backroom bastards from the New England Patriots.​

 

[Wilson]

the following have been added to the staff as equipment/ball maintenance consultants:​

• David Warner​
• Steve Smith​
• Cameron Bancroft​
• Darren Lehmann​
• a few shady backroom bastards from the New England Patriots.​

Don't forget Dave Alred and Paul Stridgeon from England's 2011 world cup campaign

https://www.google.co.uk/amp/s/amp....11/sep/30/rugby-world-cup-england-ball-switch

 

[Kenny Powers]

the following have been added to the staff as equipment/ball maintenance consultants:

• David Warner
• Steve Smith
• Cameron Bancroft
• Darren Lehmann
• a few shady backroom bastards from the New England Patriots.

Whilst not a player, does Pat Howard get the role of High Performance Manager?

 

[cyclopath]

the following have been added to the staff as equipment/ball maintenance consultants:

• David Warner
• Steve Smith
• Cameron Bancroft
• Darren Lehmann
• a few shady backroom bastards from the New England Patriots.

Bancroft would surely be the physio, in charge of, you know, taping stuff.

 

[Dismal Pillock]

Whilst not a player, does Pat Howard get the role of High Performance Manager?

I don't know who he is.

the staffing ranks now looking suitably bloated

Selectors: Aunty Doris, Aunty Raewyn from up the shops, her niece, the babysitter, the baby, and a very confused Wayne Gunston​

Coach: Dan Crowley - undercover cop​

Laptop analysis: Quade Cooper - computer theft​

Team Masseuse: Alan Jones – public bogs gay sex solicitation​

Video Analysis: Alan Jones – re; bogs film at 11​

Treasurer: Nick Farr Jones – can’t fahkin remember​

Security: Doug Roake: murder, robbery. although no deaths under his watch at Richie’s wedding. Well done, shithead.​

Team Bus Driver: Dan Carter – drunk driver

Groundskeeper: Tony Daly - 500 hours community service for serial theft and driving offences ​

ballboys: Dave Alred and Paul Stridgeon​

equipment/ball maintenance consultants: David Warner, Steve Smith, Darren Lehmann and a few shady backroom bastards from the New England Patriots.​

physio, in charge of, you know, taping stuff: Cameron Bancroft

 

[Kenny Powers]

I don't know who he is.

Pat Howard is current High Performance Manager for Cricket Australian and a former High Performance Manager for the ARU and a former Wallaby back (20 tests).

Career highlight video for your viewing pleasure;

 

[waiopehu oldboy]

Paddy Jackson and Stuart Olding both faced court today on their rape charges: http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-northern-ireland-42874775

Also worth noting that Olding is a fullback

Both acquitted, together with two other co-accused:

https://i.stuff.co.nz/sport/rugby/i...paddy-jackson-stuart-olding-acquitted-of-rape

 

[brokendown]

reports coming in say Keith Murdoch has died;so I guess there is a spot open on the bench!
met Murdoch way back in 1975 on the gold coast-had a few beers with him,seemed a nice bloke

 

[Dismal Pillock]

reports coming in say Keith Murdoch has died;so I guess there is a spot open on the bench!

raises an interesting technicality visa visor selection; not actually sure whether or not DEATH actually precludes selection. I see Lauaki is still on the bench. Could be some Weekend at Bernie's shenanigans going on out there.

 

[Hound]

raises an interesting technicality visa visor selection; not actually sure whether or not DEATH actually precludes selection. I see Lauaki is still on the bench. Could be some Weekend at Bernie's shenanigans going on out there.

I think that in the matter of ALL time crims Death would only be a minor hiccup.

 

[Dismal Pillock]

how the fuck did the 2 Irish rapists get off scot free when there was blood on the gruds and the cockwads are on record bragging about raping her? "Legends" etc.

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2018/apr/13/rugby-misogynists-public-support​

​

Selectors NOT pleased about this. Particularly Aunty Raewyn. Looking to make an example out of this case. Oldman usurps Ella at fullback. Paddy straight into 1st XV at 1st 5​

".....first fucken FIVE, shithead....."

 

[Dismal Pillock]

Local Woman Assaulted​

​

--Wollongong Gazette--​

​

Local rugby selector Aunty Raewyn has mistaken a member of the public for one of the jury members in an Irish rape trial and punched her right in the fucken face. Mrs Shelly Turnbuckle of Wollongong-upon-Wollongong was minding her own fucken business at Wollongong Mall, chatting with friends about her husband Ian's toenail clipping collection when BAM!, Aunty Raewyn connected good and proper with her, right in the fucken shnozz. ​

​

"No f**ken apolgies here" said Aunty Raewyn, "I'm gonna keep swinging until I connect with the jury members who acquited these two rapist fuckwits."​

​

"F**ken rapist c**t."​

Local rugby selector Aunty Raewyn.​

 

[waiopehu oldboy]

how the fuck did the 2 Irish rapists get off scot free when there was blood on the gruds and the cockwads are on record bragging about raping her? "Legends" etc.

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2018/apr/13/rugby-misogynists-public-support​

​

Selectors NOT pleased about this. Particularly Aunty Raewyn. Looking to make an example out of this case. Oldman usurps Ella at fullback. Paddy straight into 1st XV at 1st 5​

"...first fucken FIVE, shithead..."

Ulster have apparently sacked them:

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.mi...gby-players-paddy-jackson-stuart-12360738.amp

Looks like IRFU may do likewise. It's no more than they deserve, I wonder if the complainant can go after them in civil court over the video etc?

 

[waiopehu oldboy]

According to one of the many post-trial articles not all the blood on the sheets belonged to the complainant so they airbrushed it out of the pictures shown to the jury so as not to confuse the poor dears. The more of those articles I read the more WTF? I get. Some of this shit is literally unbelievable.

 

[Derpus]

According to one of the many post-trial articles not all the blood on the sheets belonged to the complainant so they airbrushed it out of the pictures shown to the jury so as not to confuse the poor dears. The more of those articles I read the more WTF? I get. Some of this shit is literally unbelievable.

Surely there are some procedural rules relating to evidence being broken here?

 

[waiopehu oldboy]

^^^^^^^^^ the Judge didn't seem to think so:

"The jury was shown photographs of Mr Jackson's bloodstained bedsheets. However, the judge ordered other bloodstains on the sheets, which did not come from the complainant, should be "airbrushed" from the photos after the defence argued they would distract the jury. The source of the other blood was never explained in the trial, and Mr Jackson's lawyer told the court he had "no intention of saying where this blood came from"."

http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-northern-ireland-43739323

Honestly, if I hadn't read it on BBC.com I'd have thought it was FAKE NEWS!!!