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Gradual Unfurling of New Wallaby Coaches

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redstragic

Alan Cameron (40)
What would be the correct term for Totality's helpers?
Tonto?
Partialities?
Decaf?

Unemployed.

Guys I think we need to put a lid on our banter here. Totality is on his way to OZ and I am worried as fuck he will take offense and take all our jobs and do a smashing a job. Ireland is hovering at 14.8% unemployed. Coincidence that this is also where Totality has called home????? I fuckin think not.
 

Bruce Ross

Ken Catchpole (46)
Unemployed.

Guys I think we need to put a lid on our banter here. Totality is on his way to OZ and I am worried as fuck he will take offense and take all our jobs and do a smashing a job. Ireland is hovering at 14.8% unemployed. Coincidence that this is also where Totality has called home????? I fuckin think not.

You've lifted the bar a couple of notches,rt.
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RedsHappy

Tony Shaw (54)
Oh dear. Poor Phil Blake - the one successful recent Wallaby Assistant Coach, he got Wallaby defence back to something like its old standards - looks highly uncertain to retained by the ARU. And it looks like there's multiple machinations re Totality's totality over in the ARU HQ hot house...and the Totality story is clearly biting now:

(A PS: Just have to add that the June Tests against a formidable 6N winner are only 2 and a bit months away...do we seem prepared as a coaching team?)


Axe looming for Wallabies' assistant
28/3/2012 3:56 PM
Adam Lucius Sportal

Former rugby league star Phil Blake is set to become the next fall guy following Australia’s failure to capture the World Cup, with the axe looming over the Wallabies’ assistant despite him enjoying Robbie Deans’ backing.

With a power struggle going on between Deans and high performance manager David Nucifora over the make-up of Australia’s coaching staff for the 2012 international season, Blake may join former assistant coach Jim Williams in being dumped.

That’s despite the former NRL whiz being credited for stiffening the Wallabies’ defence and improving other key aspects of their rugby in his role as defensive/skills coach.

Blake’s manager Andrew Fraser is waiting to hear back from the Australian Rugby Union and is uncertain what direction the governing body intends taking.

No firm decision has been made on the coaching structure despite the international rugby season beginning in June.

"We haven't heard any news from the ARU yet, but remain hopeful Phil will continue to be part of the Wallabies coaching structure for 2012 and beyond," Blake’s manager Andrew Fraser told Sportal.

"There is genuine interest in Phil from overseas clubs and that is an option if the ARU can't find a place for Phil within their structure.”

“But his preferred option is to continue what he started with the Wallabies."

“The team has made great strides in the time he has been there and Phil has worked up a great relationship with Robbie.”

“They won the Tri-Nations for the first time in 10 years and finished a creditable third at World Cup so I’m not sure why you’d want to change things now.

Deans is a big believer in Blake’s ability and is keen to keep him on staff.

But the appointment of former Munster coach Tony McGahan as the Wallabies’ coaching co-ordinator is set to leave Deans with little power and Blake out in the cold.

Blake is currently assistant coach at the Western Force but faces an uncertain future in Australian rugby if axed by the Wallabies.
 

Brisbok

Cyril Towers (30)
Oh dear. Poor Phil Blake - the one successful recent Wallaby Assistant Coach, he got Wallaby defence back to something like its old standards - looks highly uncertain to retained by the ARU. And it looks like there's multiple machinations re Totality's totality over in the ARU HQ hot house...and the Totality story is clearly biting now:

(A PS: Just have to add that the June Tests against a formidable 6N winner are only 2 and a bit months away...do we seem prepared as a coaching team?)

Totally!
 

Bruce Ross

Ken Catchpole (46)
Oh dear. Poor Phil Blake - the one successful recent Wallaby Assistant Coach, he got Wallaby defence back to something like its old standards - looks highly uncertain to retained by the ARU. And it looks like there's multiple machinations re Totality's totality over in the ARU HQ hot house...and the Totality story is clearly biting now:

(A PS: Just have to add that the June Tests against a formidable 6N winner are only 2 and a bit months away...do we seem prepared as a coaching team?)

You are a worry wart, RH. In any other year there might have been some cause for concern but that's why someone who is in some way connected with the ARU, if not its board, signed up Totality Tony. He will get things sorted out in plenty of time for the June Tests. Don't you worry about that, as Queensland's favourite son was given to saying.

Last Friday this appeared in the Irish Examiner:
McGahan resolutely focused on Munster
By Simon Lewis​
Provincial trouble may be disappearing in the rear-view mirror and Test-match glory on the road in front of him but Tony McGahan will consider neither while there is still the job of leading Munster’s assault on two trophies over the next 10 weeks.

With a Heineken Cup quarter-final to prepare for and the resumption of Munster’s pursuit of a home RaboDirect Pro12 semi-final berth tomorrow night in Galway, reflections on a time in charge of a transitional period in the province’s rugby history will have to wait until the Australian completes his tenure as director of coaching at season’s end.

The Final of the RaboDirect Pro 12 competition in which Munster currently lies second is scheduled to be held on "26/27 May". Why they need two days for the fixture is unclear although the competition rules may provide for unlimited extra time.

Be that as it may by late afternoon on May 27 Totality will have time to address his winning team; give the Irish Examiner his "reflections on a time in charge of a transitional period in the province’s rugby history"; go home and pack; then dash to the airport to catch a flight to Australia. He should land in Sydney some time on the 29th bright-eyed and bushy-tailed; catch a cab or jog to St Leonards; introduce himself to Phil Blake before garbage bagging him out the door; and then brief Robbie on the match strategy for the Test against Scotland seven days later. Easy as.
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p.Tah

John Thornett (49)
This has now caught on at work. If we're given an impossible deadline for a project, we now say 'Tough yes, but I bet Tony could do it'. No one knows who the hell Tony is, but that doesnt seem to matter. There is one bloke in accounts called Tony who is a bit nervous he is going to get a crap load of work shortly but I think he's worked it out.

It's even morphed into Chuck Norris type jokes:

1) on the first day God created light and separated it from darkness, calling light 'day' and the dark 'night'. On the second day God created Tony and then Tony said 'thanks mate, I can take it from here.

2) how many Tony's does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Light bulbs are no longer required because there is enought light shining from Tony's butt to illuminate the universe.
 

Brisbok

Cyril Towers (30)
Figured a Bokke would say that.........

Haha, don't worry...our coaching staff is far from resolved at this stage either. So we've got a brand new coach who hasn't even been able to appoint another person to his coaching staff at this stage and we have 3 Tests against England just around the corner! o_O
 

redstragic

Alan Cameron (40)
Bruce, I worry that Totality will be shit-canning everyone at St Leonards after jogging there from the airport.

If he wore some kind of bluetooth headset he could phone bone them on the run over.

Makes sense because he'll be perspiring and really needing a shower after the weights session he'll do as soon as he gets to HQ. Dingo and JON can hand him soap and a towel while he gives them the 2012 Wallaby plan.

I am really wondering where this thread will end.
 

cyclopath

George Smith (75)
Staff member
I now have a third option for my patients - you can have surgery, radiotherapy, or a session of Tony who will sort the fuck out of your prostate cancer. *


* This treatment may contain hyperbole. Consult your etymologist before accepting its veracity.
 

Gnostic

Mark Ella (57)
I wonder how much laughter and humorous banter there will be in June? I would really like to have a read of that review. Is this how you sack a coach that was prematurely re-signed against all reason that the ARU cannot afford to terminate?

I too have had a chuckle at this thread, but my laughter is becoming disbelieving and slightly manic at this cluster &%#@#.
 

rugbysmartarse

Alan Cameron (40)
12 months ago weren't we similarly worried about nucifora (coaching coordinator?) taking over the head role? Maybe there are no ulterior motives, just the aru adding too many layers to the (fruit) cake?
 

vidiot

John Solomon (38)
I wonder how much laughter and humorous banter there will be in June

To be fair on TT and *PWIFOYD...

This, like last year and next year, is a rebuilding and development year working towards the big internationals in 2014.

*Play-Whats-In-Front-Of-You Deans
 

Bruce Ross

Ken Catchpole (46)
In Australian rugby every year "is a rebuilding and development year working towards the big internationals in [insert the year of your choice]".

Despite the fact that he said: "I’ll be dealing with the totality of the strength and conditioning", I hope Totality leaves Ashley Jones to do his job. I want to see what happens when we have a Wallabies team who are big and strong and want to intimidate. We've been waiting too long.
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Hawko

Tony Shaw (54)
Its very sad for Phil Blake but the one member of the Wallaby coaching staff who did do his job exceptionally well up to the World Cup is going to be unemployed. There are two things he can hold onto:
  1. Pride in the job he did. The one area we played well at the World Cup was our defence. The game against the Boks was his ultimate justification.
  2. The knowledge that he is better off out of the Wallaby coaching positions now that the lunatics have taken over the asylum. His reputation won't be trashed while he tries to make his way through the infighting and backstabbing that is going to go on as Tony and Dingo fight for the top job.
JON has done some (not many, but some) good things during his time, but the way he has appointed Deans for an extra two years, then the way he allowed this review to be conducted, the way that clearly no one is responsible for the implimentation of the review so that everyone is trying to implement the solutions they think might work and the disaster to the reputation that the ARU is suffering leave no right alternative but for him, Deans, Nucifora and McGahan to resign. Won't happen but it is the only honorable solution.
 
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