Dismal Pillock
Simon Poidevin (60)
Wayne Gunston's Fukushima Spa and Hot Pools.
Gidday, dickheads.
Welcome to Wayne Gunston's Fukushima Spa and Hot Pools.
I am Wayne Gunston of Wayne Gunston's Fukushima Spa and Hot Pools.
Our spot on the beautiful Fukushima coastline looks even better in broad daylight!
What a truly immersive and submersive experience it is soaking in the hot pools at
Wayne Gunston's Fukushima Spa and Hot Pools.
One brief thing first; can you fucking swim?
Because some of our pools are very, very fucking deep.
If you bring in toddlers make sure they have their water wings on.
It's quite dark inside our hot pools.
Like this:
"Mummy? Mummy, where are you? Mummy, help me, mummy, I
think I'm being sucked out to seeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaa..."
Aah, that was refreshing.
Had enough soaking in the hot pools?
Why not pop onto a sunbed!
Chuck away your brolly, no need for sunglasses or some stupid old lady's bonnet, we here at Wayne Gunston's Fukushima Spa and Hot Pools harness all the rich warmth of natural fissive energy to give YOU a warm a soothing and PERMANENT all-over glowing tan! Even on your nuts!*
*if you're a lady and you don't have a nutsack at the present time, well, you will after this.
Wayne Gunston's Fukushima Spa and Hot Pools are located here;
Never mind the barbeques in the adjacent buildings.
That's a separate business and you are not invited so just stay put in those hot pools or on that fucking sunbed!
Gunston Google InfoMercial:
We take pre-bookings.
Pay now, pasty c**ts.
"This way to Wayne Gunston's Fukushima Spa and Hot Pools! Mind your step, woman!"
"Haha, he says he can't land a plane and his chin was like that BEFORE he went to Wayne Gunston's Fukushima Spa and Hot Pools!
"I order you to get back on that fucking sunbed!"
Righto, I'm sure we'll be seeing you soon down here at
Wayne Gunston's Fukushima Spa and Hot Pools.
Don't forget to pack your lead-lined togs! That is if you ever want to replace your toddlers that got washed out to sea, hahahaha, dickheads!
--Wayne Gunston of
Wayne Gunston's Fukushima Spa and Hot Pools.