I've been thinking, and I believe I've finally come across the source of the Blues problems. The Blues are, quite simply, a big game team. Look at this season, for example. The best South African side in Johannesburg? Bring on Afrikaaner McBoerface, the illegitimate son of Louis Luyt and Suzy the Waitress, and the biggest homer of a home town ref. Best Australian side in Sydney? Pack 'em Waratahs full of front line Wallabies and watch the great blue wall hold them off with the 3rd XV of assorted Kiwi potheads rounded up on the GC the night before the match.
Want more proof? Okay. Lets look at the long term, empirical, trend. This big game temperament has resulted in the Blues winning 73% of their postseason matches. For comparisons sake, the Chiefs have an unmanly postseason record of 54%. The Hurricanes a contemptible 43%. The Crusaders a respectable 70%. The Highlanders an appalling 42%. Such a dominant -- intimidating, even -- postseason record has returned three titles, bettered only by one side in the entire southern half of the planet.
Of course, this big game temperament does have a downside. For there has been many a slight hiccup in matches of lesser magnitude. Such as the recent Rebels, for instance. And the Crusaders one before that. And the Hurricanes one before that. And so on and so forth.
Still. Whenever they do make the postseason, then holy sh*t balls, dial it up to DEFCON 1, deploy SEAL Team 6, and lock up your wives and daughters if they're within 10,000,000 km of Paremoremo. Because the jailbreak will have absolutely no breaks whatsoever.
Disclaimer: This post may not be entirely srs, and may contain trace amounts of peanuts. Also sarcasm. And stats abuse. Conditions apply. Results may vary.
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