Worst Commentator Pole Action

[ChargerWA]

I know enough German to make sense of most Afrikaans and his accent isn't that 'foreign' to me but it's the verbosity and tone of his voice that I can't listen to for more than a half hour or so.

It sounds like he has a plum in his mouth and he is trying to talk around it.

 

[boyo]

The Alternative Rugby Commentary is a hoot.

http://www.arcrugby.co.nz/

 

[boyo]

Alternative Rugby Commentary - Rugby For Americans

 

[Dan54]

I have come to the conclusion that a lot of us need to turn off volume at times, because noone seems to like any commentators. I not keen on Kearns I admit, and definitely prefer him and Marto are not together because they seem to just try and play funny buggers, but not very well. But all in all I don't really dislike any commentator as much as a lot of GAGRs obviously. I actually generally like Saffa ones as they tend to know their rugby, and generally I find that with kiwi ones and comments men too. Funnily enough with Aussie ones, I never used to like Bray, but find him good with his knowledge really, and same with comments men from Aus, generally good.
I think a lot of people don't like commentators that don't say exactly what they think, or more importantly don't blow air up the arses of players that they like, or are commentating on games where their teams are losing so refer to comments on blowing air etc ,but on their teams!!!

 

[badabing59]

Chaps, tell us what is worth telling us, explain the rulings (if you can), tell us the name of the player who does something, and forget about the predictions, the excuses, and the bloody cliches. We have eyes, we can see quite a lot on our screens, it is your job to tell us what we cannot see, and to explain the technical details (remembering that, hopefully, there are some viewers who actually know less about rugby than the commentators - as unlikely as that sounds).

It would be particularly interesting to know a bit about the background of the less experienced players. Where do they come from, which school/club, etc. Radical, eh?

Gold. Need to add nothing to this.

 

[badabing59]

Speaking from depressing bloody England (god I miss the sun), special mention should be given to the Nthn Hemisphere commentators. Jonathon Davies, who has to be the whiniest most negative commentator I've ever heard, Eddie Butler whose one-eyed smugness towards England is on a par with Marto's man-love with the all things Red, and of course the ever -patronising Clive Woodward.

 

[boyo]

I wish that there was an option for the audio to hear only the ref' and the crowd.

 

[yourmatesam]

I wish that there was an option for the audio to hear only the ref' and the crowd.

This. So many times, I want to hear what the ref is actually asking of the players, not what the commentators think about a certain passage of play. It's also great to hear what the captains/players in close proximity to the ref are saying as well.

 

[Blue]

I know enough German to make sense of most Afrikaans and his accent isn't that 'foreign' to me but it's the verbosity and tone of his voice that I can't listen to for more than a half hour or so.

Sounds familiar. I can deal with about 20 minutes of Strayan a day.

 

[EatSleepDrinkRuck]

Why the Kearns hate?

I voted Greg Martin because he doesn't know what he's talking about.

Kearnsy is a colour commentator - his job is to be the Gus Gould on the panel, the Joe Rogan, the John Madden, the Justin Marshall, the Clive Woodward.

These guys aren't there to provide you with an impartial, passive account of the play - they're there to provide conflict and interest. Its like getting all bent out of shape by newspaper articles about the Ashes - they exist to create controversy.

 

[Ash]

What irks me is commentators who don't know the rules.

Some of the Aus commentators are pretty bad in this regard. Marto took a refs course and he still doesn't know them! Horan is another, he played the game at the top level for years and can't say why the ref awarded the penalty, even when the ref clearly signals it. I played subbies and could understand the ref signals, it's not hard. Clarke, Sharpe and Kafer generally seem to know the rules.

The Kiwi comms generally understand the rules and mostly get them right, especially with Mexted gone. They are the best of the bunch in that regard I think.

The SA comms are the worst for not understanding the rules surrounding rucks and the tackling ending and releasing the ball, they just call next to nothing right. The other thing is they don't think about what the ref rules - NZ and Aus comms, rightly or wrongly (with Marto and Kearns and Horan frequently wrongly!), will comment on if the ref was right or wrong, but the SA comms just generally say verbatim what was ruled and move on. I suspect there's some decision been made on the SA commentary side that they won't criticise ref decisions or performances, but it means they quickly gloss over what the ref does.

 

[Dan54]

I wish that there was an option for the audio to hear only the ref' and the crowd.

There is, unfortunately it on Sky in NZ and not here in Oz

 

[Bullrush]

Honestly, the Aussies are terrible. I've mentioned this a couple of times but I was absolutely stunned a few weeks back when one of the Rebels was YC'd for throwing punches in the Cheetahs game and the commentators were saying it was a bad call?! Clear-as-day upper-cut and the Fox guys were saying a YC was unwarranted.

Not to mention some of their pronunciation of player names - esepcially the PI boys. It's a fucken disgrace sometimes.

May as well resort to this:

 

[Bullrush]

In saying that, I still voted for Mexted....LOL

 

[Scoey]

I struggle listening to any of the Aus Fox commentators (with the exception of Kafer and Sharpe) because they simply don't add anything to the broadcast; at all.

All commentators are biased to a degree, some just have less control over it than others and I'm ok with that. I really enjoy listening to the Kiwi and Saffa commentators generally as they seem to have more knowledge of the game. That's what it comes down to for me.

Oh and this business about 'colour commentators' is rubbish. It's a game of footy, not open mic night at the local comedy club. If one of the regular guys throw the odd one-liner in, great. There is absolutely no need for some guy to have the sole purpose of adding 'colour'. Ugh.

 

[Ruggo]

Yeah, to a point Kearns plays the one-eyed fool, Martin just is.
I'm not a big fan of listening to either.

What pisses me off is that these blokes, including Horan are some of our best Wallabies. Without doubt they know their stuff but they just show no intent to share it with the audience. Horan tries to play smart but he just comes across as horrid. It is like he never does his homework and just makes a goose of himself.

I think we all love Sharpie. It isn't just his insight and knowledge but he shares it with a vibe that just makes the experience fun.

 

[Nusadan]

Speaking of talking about background of players etc: here's how the late Bill McLaren, the Scottish doyen of rugby commentators of all time, prepares before each match:

I have seen one of them at Murrayfield, it was very fascinating to read.

His family have donated much of Bill's work to a charity, you will see in the pic the reams of prematch notes:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-south-scotland-12224241

 

[The_Brown_Hornet]

I enjoy Kearns because I think he's naturally a bit of a clown. A bit of humour and levity in a sports broadcast is a good thing IMHO, because let's face it, it's only a game. I get the criticism of Marto and mostly echo it. The Saffer commentators I have a hard time with because of the accent. In person I find it alright but for some reason on the telly it irks me, especially Hugh Bladen (Stransky is good though). Marshall I've warmed to over the years and find him to be quite quite knowledgeable and fairly impartial. TJ isn't bad, but I've never had a lot of time for Nesbit.

Keith Quinn was always the bloke who shat me the most. Cycloptic doesn't even half way cover it.

With all of that said Mexted was my favourite, because he used to say some of the most bizarre things and somehow they came out sounding hilarious. An accidental genius almost.

 

[terry j]

worst commentator pole action?

Hmm, do they slide up and down the pole sensuously with or without their clobber?

To be frank, a competition that I'd move heaven and hell to remove myself as a judge from.

 

[Braveheart81]

I enjoy Kearns because I think he's naturally a bit of a clown. A bit of humour and levity in a sports broadcast is a good thing IMHO, because let's face it, it's only a game. I get the criticism of Marto and mostly echo it. The Saffer commentators I have a hard time with because of the accent. In person I find it alright but for some reason on the telly it irks me, especially Hugh Bladen (Stransky is good though). Marshall I've warmed to over the years and find him to be quite quite knowledgeable and fairly impartial. TJ isn't bad, but I've never had a lot of time for Nesbit.

Keith Quinn was always the bloke who shat me the most. Cycloptic doesn't even half way cover it.

With all of that said Mexted was my favourite, because he used to say some of the most bizarre things and somehow they came out sounding hilarious. An accidental genius almost.

This reflects my views pretty closely regarding both the Australian and New Zealand commentators although I wasn't a big fan of Mexted.

I'm not really fussed by the accents of the South African commentators.

I always found Gordon Bray to be a very annoying commentator. I definitely prefer Greg Clark and Sean Maloney. I actually quite like Maloney's excitement.

Of the Fox team, I think Marto and Horan are the worst two because they provide the least accurate insight into the play and the decisions being made on the field.

I disagree that the Australian team is worse than the New Zealand or South Africans. They are all much of a muchness.