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Worst Commentator Pole Action

Discussion in 'Rugby Matches' started by Dismal Pillock, Mar 23, 2014.


Worst Commentator?

Phil Kearns 60 vote(s) 43.5%
All of the above 11 vote(s) 8.0%
Tony Johnstone 8 vote(s) 5.8%
Grant Nesbit 7 vote(s) 5.1%
Keith Quinn 4 vote(s) 2.9%
Greg Martin 59 vote(s) 42.8%
Justin Marshall 7 vote(s) 5.1%
Shiggins 12 vote(s) 8.7%
Murray Mexted 11 vote(s) 8.0%
the bokke guy who sounds a bit posh 11 vote(s) 8.0%
Multiple votes are allowed.
  1. Up the Guts Tony Shaw (54)

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    Had to justify why they needed a full team of Aus comms there.
    John S likes this.
  2. Scoey Tony Shaw (54)

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    Clarkie does my freaking head in. He's just a cliche robot and nothing more these days. It also seems like his hard drive is slowly corrupting and his cliche library is getting smaller each time he is rolled out and booted up.
    Dismal Pillock likes this.
  3. cyclopath Phil Waugh (73)

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    Dunno who it was, but whoever ejaculated "Not all heroes wear capes!!" as Cokanasiga (I believe) flopped over for an easy try for England against USA last week deserves to be locked in a box with Justin Marshall and Phil Kearns and not let out forever.
    Dismal Pillock and John S like this.
  4. Dismal Pillock John Hipwell (52)

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    so he's Nisbo except he actually came with a cliche library
    cyclopath likes this.
  5. formerflanker Desmond Connor (43)

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    Good call during a Fijian breakout v Georgia involving multiple players and several magic passes from the flying Fijians:
    "it's just not fair sometimes"
  6. Dismal Pillock John Hipwell (52)

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    Seems to be some sort of paradoxical rule in effect in that the better the player was, the more drab and boring they are in the comm booth; George Gregan, Tim Horan, Christian Cullen...
    Jimmy_Crouch and Up the Guts like this.
  7. cyclopath Phil Waugh (73)

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  8. Dismal Pillock John Hipwell (52)

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    this poles results to date still seem wackily kaput to me. On a sliding scale from 0-100, 0 being zero hate, 100 being max hate, I7d be at

    Tony Johnstone. 99. It's only not 100 because he's speaking English. Fuck this shrieking disdainful arseclown and his anti-Auckland agenda. Right up the shitter sideways.

    Justin Marshall. 85. ffs would you PLEASE stop shouting at me. HOW can he have played 8 million test matches for the AB's and yet be so consistently wrong so fucken often? If Justin Marshall told me the sun was yellow then I would immediately think "oh, the fucker must actually be green then."

    Gregan: 70. the human drone corporate pastiche and cliche bot

    Phil Kearns: 60. as the sun sets on his hopes and dreams for Australian rugby, even his tears aren't quite as caustic as they used to be

    Greg Martin: 40. he loves the Reds, we get it.

    Grant Nesbit: 15. half off in the land of nod these days. wftever

    Greg Clark. 3. stats guy, harmless, he's like your nana's old wallpaper
  9. Dismal Pillock John Hipwell (52)

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    Local Rugby Commentator Rushed to ICU

    --NZ Herald--

    A local rugby commentator has been rushed to Christchurch ICU with 3rd-degree friction burns all up and down his genitalia.

    The individual was airlifted from Forsythe Barr Stadium and choppered to Christchurch immediately after the rugby match in Dunedin finished.

    "He appeared to be delirious and in a high state of excitement" said a nurse. "He kept saying 'virus?, virus?, no, no, I need a ventilator to immediately intubate my wanger in a nuclear rod cooling pool so I can quickly get back to tugging the thing ASAP".

    "We had to calm him down and tell him 'Sir, this is an ICU, we don't have any nuclear rod cooling pools on the premises'. Then he resumed stimulating himself to issue and ran off out of the hospital and into the night with his groin area still glowing and emitting huge great plumes of steam".

    The individual, seen here leaving Christchurch ICU.
    KiwiM, KOB1987 and Up the Guts like this.

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